femmefatale

I've a NEW BLOG!!!

2009-08-29T23:25:00.002+08:00

go check me out www.kristygeraldine.blogspot.com

The life of the Un-interesting

2009-07-14T22:27:00.002+08:00

I haven't been blogging much as I've been too busy updating myself by reading other people's blogs. And by reading all these blogs, it's made me NOT wanna blog much anymore. It's so un-inspiring to realise that my life isn't a tad bit interesting at all.

I mean, I don't get invited to events and launches of anything anymore like I used to, so I don't get to meet important or beautiful people anymore, or rub shoulders with the whos and whats while sipping on wine.

No more dressing up and looking all ready to party because this mama ain't partying no more. No more clubs, or JD parties, or Mambo Jumbos, or whatever.

I'm not a glamorous celebrity so I don't get stalked by psychotic looneybins. I'm not a famous blogger so I don't get other jealous bloggers giving me bad publicity. I'm not paid to do advertorials although advertisers do advertise on my site (thank you!!!).

No. In fact, I'm just a half-crazed mother-slash-wife who's main reason in life is to scream at her one-oil cysted-eye daughter NOT to play with the dirty pink house slippers, who cracks her brain juice deciding what to cook for dinner (which doesn't happen very often anymore if you realise the lack of recipe blogs), who gets herself and daughter locked up inside a show house for more than half an hour, who's one excitement in life is the pasar malam on Saturday nights.

AnnUma asked me, "So are you guys going away on a holiday anytime soon?"

And I replied, "You know the roadshow SK has to go on for work? Yeah, I'm following him".

That's me. And the life I've become.

Not the least bit interesting.

Simple Dinner on a Wednesday Night

2009-06-04T02:03:00.006+08:00

It's hard to prepare dinner and do the house chores and look after a baby that crawls everywhere at the same time and it can be very tiring. So, the dishes that I usually make are pretty simple, takes very little preparation time and even less cooking time.
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And again, if someone like me that's so new in this 'kitchen stuff' can do it, I don't think it would be too hard for anyone else.
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Fried Pork with Sweet & Sour Sauce
..
Ingredients
pork fillet cut into cubes
4 tsp cornflour
1 medium egg white
salt
black pepper
Chinese 5-spice powder
cucumber for garnishing
oil
sweet & sour sauce
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Method
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Whisk the egg white and cornflour until it becomes a smooth blend. Add in a pinch of salt, black pepper and 5-spice powder. Mix well.
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Add in the pork and mix until the pork is well covered. Reserved.
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Heat the wok and add in the oil. When the oil is very hot, put in the pork cubes piece by piece and stir-fry for 3 - 4 minutes until it turns a golden beige. Add in the sweet & sour sauce and stir-fry for another 3 minutes on low fire.
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Remove from wok, garnish with sliced cucumber and it's ready to serve.
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Tom Yum Styled Steam Fish
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Ingredients
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1 medium sized white pomphret
12 ladies fingers / okra
3 tomatoes
2 tsp of Tom Yum paste
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Method
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Using a round shallow steel plate, marinate the fish thoroughly in it with the tom yum paste. Set aside and reserve.
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Cut the ladies fingers/okra into halves and the tomatoes into fours. Distribute them evenly around the fish.
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Put 300ml of water in the wok and put to boil. Place the plate of fish on a stand inside the wok and cover. Turn the fire down to low and put to steam for 20 minutes.
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Ready to be served.

Hairkenstein

2009-06-03T17:35:00.003+08:00

Welcome to femmefatale's museum of hair gone wrong.

in Beijing - May 2007

Here, as you can see, are a compilation of all the hairstyles I've gone through since I can't even remember when.

Maya Hotel - Jan 2008

But this, yes THIS, has got to be the worse one ever!

no, not this...this was V Day 2006...ok, maybe this was quite bad too

Instead of going to see Fred@LeVi as usual, I decided to try out a new place nearer home, hoping that they'll do a wondertasticlous job and I won't ever have to travel so far to do my hair again (remember, I'm now living in the 'countryside').

New Years @ Singapore - 2005/06

So, I walked into this saloon, it's called Evergreen by the way, so please enter only if you dare (or if you have too much money to waste) and told them exactly what I wanted - to color, trim, treat and reshape my out-of-shape hair.

Gentings - Dec 2005

I even showed them a picture so that they'd at least have a clue about what I was asking for and they nodded and assured me that they understood perfectly what I wanted. Of course, it didn't help with the fact that their English was atrocious and I couldn't speak cantonese for nuts.

Camerons - May 2005

4 hours later, I looked like this.

yes, THIS!!!

And I had to pay a whopping RM698 to look like this! And in 'this', I mean 'SHIT'!

here, let me show you again...even Renee looks horrified

Apparently, the treatment they gave me was some latest scientific technology from Kerastase, the color was some X brand from dunno which country and yada yada...

My last words to them before I walked out were "I'm extremely unhappy with your work and I will NEVER come back here again - except to wash my hair".

And that's also because they tried to pacify me by giving me free shampoo and masque (which I genuinely think they already included the cost into my bill) and so, if I brought the shampoo and masque with me when I go for a hair wash, instead of charging me the usual RM45, they will only charge me RM18. Whatever!

Sigh....

I look like an alien mop gone wrong now.

It's all about chicken

2009-06-02T00:03:00.004+08:00

Since FattyHubby comes home later on Mondays, instead of cooking dishes, I decided to try a new recipe. I came across this in the Curries & Asian Food recipe book but improvised a little on the method of cooking and ingredients to make it taste more like something I would make.

It's pretty easy. I started preparing (as in chopping the onions and garlic and boiling the rice as well) at 6pm and dinner was ready before 8pm.

Sweet & Sour Rice with Chicken

Ingredients
2 tsp sesame oil
1 tsp Chinese 5-spice powder
1 garlic clove chopped
1 onion chopped
4 tbsp tomato ketchup
1 tbsp tomato puree
2 tbsp honey
1 tbsp vinegar
1 tbsp dark soya sauce
3 boneless chicken thigh cut into cubes
1 carrot shredded
600ml water
steamed rice for 4pax
oil

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Method
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Mix together the sesame oil and Chinese 5-spice powder and marinate the chicken with it. Heat the wok, then add the oil and when hot, cook the garlic and onion.

Add in the chicken and stir-fry over a medium fire until the chicken is cooked through. Remove from wok and keep warm.

Stir the rice into the wok and add in the water, tomato ketchup, tomato puree, honey, vinegar and dark soya sauce. Stir well to mix. Bring to boil, then simmer until almost all the liquid is absorbed. Stir in the carrots and chicken and continue to cook for another 3 minutes or so.

Done

And then, I decided, why not make another dish, something that can be eaten as a snack (cold or hot) and it MIGHT go well with the rice, so here's my OWN recipe.

Stir-fried Cucumber with Chicken Gizzard (can be served cold too)

Ingredients

3 tbsp of chilli sauce

2 lime

1 tsp salt

1 medium sized cucumber

500gr chicken gizzard

Method

Peel the outer layer of the cucumber and cut it into half length-wise. Remove the seeds with a spoon and then cut into semi-circle slices. Reserve.

Clean the chicken gizzard and cut each piece into halves. Marinate with salt. Reserve.

Heat up the wok, then add the oil and when hot, add in the chicken gizzard. Stir-fry until the gizzard is cooked through.

Add in the cucumber and stir for another 1-2 minutes, then add in the chilli sauce. Mix well and stir for another 3 minutes. Squeeze in lime.

Done.

A new category?

2009-06-01T23:17:00.002+08:00

Surprise surprise, I'm actually contemplating if I should start a new category here - The Starter Chef! I know, I know, you can close that mouth of yours now, thank you. And yes, I AM cooking and have been doing so for the pass month since we moved in here.

3 months ago, I blogged about having to boil porridge for Renee and not knowing how to go about it and I didn't even understand what Renee's pediactrician was talking about when she said 'bubur'.

Now, 3 months later, I'm whipping up carrots, tomatoes and anchovies congee, carrots, broccoli and chicken congee, fish and spinach congee, and this week, I'm even making pork congee!

That's not it. Not only am I cooking for Renee, I actually prepare dinner 3 times a week for FattyHubby and me! *applause!* Now how about that!

The first week, I made baked chicken drumstick with potatoes, carrots and chinese mushroom in herbs, and fried rice with long beans, chicken and fish cake the day after.

The second week, I made black pepper steak with baked potato spuds and a bowl of buttered, slightly salted sauteed cauliflower, baby carrots and baby corn on a Monday, baked chicken in onion sauce and ommelette on Wednesday and fried mee hoon and curry chicken on Friday.

The third week, it was vietnamese beef noodles!

I know it may only be simple dishes to you out there who are already ironchefs in your own ways, but for me, this is an ACCOMPLISHMENT! I mean, I couldn't even fry an egg before I moved out here. I'm so proud of myself and watching FattyHubby enjoy my cooking is (sometimes) so much better than getting an orgasm. Honest!

Unfortunately, I have not taken a single picture of anything that I've made so there's nothing I can post up to show you, which leads us right back to the reason of this blog - should I or should I not, start a new category?

Hmmm....

Why, I think I shall *grins*

Out of the 'Black Hole'

2009-05-27T23:24:00.003+08:00

The hubby finally agreed to purchase the Maxis mobile broadband for me! After keeping me dying and suffering in this damned black hole for nearly a month!

You have no idea what it feels like not being able to connect to the virtual world and I don't even want to try describing it. Now that I'm back, I'm loving it and I ain't complaining =)

It's not as fast and steady as a land line but it keeps me connected and that's all I want. And I won't ask for more. Except for TM to hurry up and make more phone ports here so that we can get Streamyx or P1 or whatever that's better than this mobile broadband...

So, yes, we're finally in our OWN nest....far away from everyone else (literally) and away from the hustle and bustle of city life. Our own house, own rules, own freedom.....

It's tiring of course...
Back home, I had mummy to help me with the laundry and the cooking and cleaning...
Here, it's all on our own...no help from anyone....

So it's been different, but we're settling in.

The maid will be here in a month's time (I hope) and hopefully when she's here, I'll have more time to do my own things....(shopping! hairstylist! blogging!)....hahaha!

A conversation with a cousin from Aussie went like this:

Hi Kristy, Shaun here, did you know I was back in town?

No! Nobody told me! Since when?

That's for moving out to the countryside!!!

>_<'

Guess what I found?

2009-04-08T02:06:00.002+08:00

My OLD SCRAPBOOK-DIARY-whateveritwascalledbefore thingy.

I was going through my cupboards, trying to sort out whatever I can in preparation of moving into the new home when I found it. Needless to say, my packing was forgotten after that while I flopped onto bed to flip through it.

.
.

Gawd, will you just look at that!

What was I thinking?

You know, I had short boy cropped hair since I was born and now that I'm looking at it, I realise that I'm ugly. I WAS ugly, anyways...haha....now I think I'm gorgeous, although I still don't like my hairstyle but I'm soooo much more beautiful than I was before.

Shit, so you mean all these while growing up, here I thought I was so good-looking when I was just an ugly piece of shit. Can you imagine? A piece of shit who thinks it was pretty. An ugly piece of shit with horror teeth and bad hair who thinks it was pretty.

No wonder my childhood was so weird.

Now I know why. It was all because of my stupid hair!

The stupid hair made me look ugly, and because of that I craved for attention and because of that I did all sorts of dumb things to get the attention and therefore, weird childhood.

My mother lah. Dunno how to bring me for a proper haircut.

Sheesh...all her fault.

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Oh, yes, I used to absolutely ADOREEEEEEEEEE Leon Lai.

Why, I dunno, and I still can't answer that.

Maybe because he has the height...or the charming pretty boy looks...or the weird ear...hahaha!

i wanted to be a fashion designer once upon a time

the first time CuzRoy and I took a train to Penang

proof of purchase of my first pair of versace jeans

SisSarah and CuzSandra waaaaaaaay back when they were small mites

the first dinner & show i attended with SisJodie and she paid for my bitter lemon

And then, I saw this.

And memories upon memories just came flooding back and hitting me so hard in the head I started having a headache.

Peter Lim...

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Chong Voon Hock....
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Sherman Ong....
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Oh yes, love is OH-SO-DEFINITELY blind!

NineWest or Ferragamo?

2009-04-04T17:15:00.005+08:00

Since the hubby was at work and the daughter actually woke up early today, I decided to take a stroll to Pavilion and also, to do my grand-daughterly duties of having brunch with Mama and Yeh Yeh.

Daddy and mummy decided to bring the grandparents for their favorite congee and dim sum at CrystalJadePalace and since daddy had been emphasizing on the fact that Yeh Yeh was looking forward to seeing Renee, how could I not say yes right. And also, how could I say no to going to a shopping mall where my fav Charles&Keith happens to be! *winks*

NineWest was launching their latest collection of shoes and bags in conjunction with the Pavilion Pit Stop week and so, being girls, Sarah and I floated into the fahsion show arena. Renee's first ever fashion show! Exciting-nya!

The models were all from AndrewModels and gosh, their legs, like sky high!

And they were all sooooooo skinny!

And FLAT CHESTED!!!!

Hahahaha....I don't feel so bad afterall!

In fact, I can proudly proclaim that I have a little more to show than them!

So proud!

SHUT UP!!!

I KNOW that I'm a breastfeeding mother now and that my breasts will shrink back into non-existence once I wean Renee off.

But let's just think of now and today.

Thank you.

i think she was more facinated with the disco balls above

We were seated in the 2nd row from the catwalk and were so terribly up close and personal with the long legged creatures it was just exhilirating! Our noses were practically stuck to each shoes that modelled past us and as more shoes walked pass, the deeper I fell in love with each design.

that's an exasperated Andrew in the background

It was sooooo exciting!

Mother and daughter (and of course Sarah) were watching a fashion show together for the first time and I was sure Renee was just as excited as I was to be on VIP seats at a NineWest fashion show.

SHE FELL ASLEEP!!!!

Among the gorgeous models, the even more gorgeous shoes on display, the LOUD booming music, the hype of it all, and she FELL ASLEEP!!!!

I was telling BestieKat about it later in the evening.

My daughter is soooo not a shoes and bag person lah! Imagine lah, she fell asleep at a NineWest fashion show!

Maybe she's not the NineWest type of girl leh. Maybe she's a Ferragamo shoes and bag type...

GASPS!

*clutches heart in shock*

If she ever opens her mouth for a Ferragamo, I'd die dot come Cheesie style.

Sarah and I were so into this one paticular Asian model.

She was HOT!

I tried to take a picture of her but didn't get a clear one.

she's the 2nd one from the left

She had a pair of the most gorgeous eyes and we were just drooling over her.

Hopefully Renee will grow up to be gorgeous too.

She definitely won't be flat chested. I hope.

Here she is....baring her cleavage for all to see!

Bumped into BIG Pink

2009-03-24T23:15:00.003+08:00

Bumped into an old friend in 1U on Sunday.

Have not seen her since my wedding. Not because we drifted apart but because she has been busy with work.

She and I used to car-pool to college. With me driving of course.

Know who I'm talking about?

Think PINK!
.

Anyways, she was shopping at Diva's when I saw her.

OMG, Kristy!!!!

Hey! It's been so long!

OMG, Kristy!!!

Yeah...I know...it's been too long.

OMG, Kristy!!!

Erm....*ahem*.....yeah....hey....

OMG OMG OMG!!!

*i was starting to get a litty bitty annoyed at this moment*

OMG, I can't believe I'm seeing this!
.

.
What? What?

OMG KRISTY!!! You're the hottest girl in college. The one that broke so many many hearts. The one that was always skipping classes. The rebellious sarcastic girl. The one who wanted to kill John Beh. The clubber. The alcoholic. And look at you now!!! With a baby's stroller!!! OMG OMG OMG!!! Kristy with a baby's stroller!!! That is JUST SO WRONG!!!
.
..

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-_-' whatever.

Blackout

2009-03-18T19:14:00.003+08:00

Did you see the sky this morning?

7 in the morning and it was so dark, it looked like hell on earth. No, I've never been to hell and I don't know what hell is like but I'm pretty sure it would have looked like what it looked like this morning.

Lightning streaked across the dark skies, lighting it up for split seconds, before it was enveloped back into darkness. Lightning followed by crackling thunder so loud my car alarm went off more than 3 times. And no, I didn't bother getting up to shut it off.

Our room was dark and hot.

A few houses on our street had their power robbed from them.

Our house was one of them.

Lying down in the dark, I thought back of all the times when we had blackouts.

The first memory that came flashing past was when we still had the huge fish pond in our house. It housed more than 10 of daddy's precious japanese carps, each weighing more than 20kgs, sleeked with gold, red and orange. Daddy had them from when they were tiny little things and during one blackout, more than 5 of them died.

I can still see daddy standing in the pond, fishing out the dead fishes with his hands, and he had to hold each one with both his arms, each being so heavy and slippery, then wrapping each one in newspaper before discarding them. The look on his face. It was undescribable and until today, I still have no words to describe the expression on his face.

And all I could do that time was stand there, watching him fish the dead fishes out from the water with that undescribable look on his face.

The second memory was of the time when I just returned from Cameron Highlands to a blackout house and I couldn't stand the heat so I went to meet ButtercupTjin and BlossomMich for a game of pool at Breakers, and that was when the story of me and FattyHubby started.

I've experienced so many blackouts in this house, sometimes alone, sometimes together with my sisters, sometimes with the entire family, that it has become the norm.

3 hours later, TNB fixed the problem and I drifted back to sleep.

The Kill

2009-02-28T22:12:00.003+08:00

With eyes like a hawk, she watches it zoom around the room.

It darts from top to bottom, side to side, as fast as the wind but never once did she lose sight of it. She was on a mission and her mission was to do one thing and one thing alone.

TO KILL.

It had already attacked her once and she wore the wound on her right wrist. It would not attack her again because it was smart enough to understand the mission she was on, and it knew the mission was to have it dead. To go near her again for another attack might cost it it's life and it could not risk it.

It zoomed passed her ears, taunting her, teasing her. She remained still, knowing that the slightest move might cost her the only chance of killing it. She watched it zipping around, as fast as lighting, calculating it's every move, mentally strategizing when to move in.

Soon enough, it got tired and landed out of view, or so it thought.

It stayed there, resting, unknown of its impending death.

But her eyes were sharp. She saw it. And made her move.

WHAM!!!!

It never even saw it coming.

For you

2009-02-27T14:07:00.002+08:00

This is for you.

You may not like the fact that I'm blogging this but it's the only way to show you how strongly I feel about it. Perhaps this might work better than talking to you. Because I've tried the talking oh so many many times but nothing seems to be going in. I'm so disappointed with you there are no words to describe how disappointed I am. And yes, I'm very angry with you for not having the courage to stand up for yourself. To save yourself. To stop this before it gets deeper. It's come to a point where I don't even want to care anymore. But I still do. And that's what love is. The love you think you know is NOT what love is. So I'm hoping that by doing this, you'd be able to read this over and over and over again until something sinks in.

And yes, you ARE stubborn like that.

I don't know if you are really blind (emotionally) or just in self-denial. Or maybe even scared. Because deep down inside, I know you know it's all wrong for you and yet, you do not want to get out of it.

What I don't understand is WHY?

I've been told many many times to stop trying to understand people because I will never be able to. But I DO still want to try understanding you. Because you're just not anyone. You're someone I care for deeply. That's why I'll keep trying.

You are definitely not stupid. You may be a little blind but definitely not stupid. So why are you doing this to yourself? Even you yourself know that all the signs are pointing towards DISASTER and yet, you are still heading that way. Why?

Are you so afraid to be alone in this world? So much so that you would rather spend the rest of your life being bullied and miserable rather than to be happy and alone? Is being alone so frightening that you'd sacrifice true happiness? And self-respect? And self dignity?

What she said was right, you know?

How can you expect someone to respect you when you don't even respect yourself?

Let's not even talk about respect.

Let's talk about a bit of self dignity.

You don't even have that.

Promises has been made over and over so many times. Promises to change.

But how can one change their characters? Themselves? Who they are?

They were born like that and they will die like that.

Like I've told you, do you want to live your life as a lion tamer, living everyday with the fear of not knowing when the lion is going to turn around and bite your head off? If you do, fine by me. But when the lion does bite your head off one day, you won't have the chance to walk away anymore because you'll be dead.

Let me give you an example:

You always see women in abusive relationships and then you ask yourself, why don't they get out? Because everytime the man beats the woman, he apologizes and promises never to do it again. And the woman forgives him, thinking and HOPING that he will change. The next night, he does it again, and apologizes again and promises never to do it again and the woman forgives him again, thinking and HOPING that he will change. The next night, he does it all over again.

So the question is, when WILL the woman stop hoping? When he finally beats her to death?

It all starts with one mean word from the mouth.

One name calling.

One push.

One shove.

One slap.

One punch.

You say this is different.

I say this is NOT different.

It's the same thing.

And you KNOW it's the same thing.

You can tell me lies to cover up for people. But you can't lie to yourself.

So, I'm asking you now, when are you going to stop hoping?

WHEN WILL YOU HAVE THE COURAGE TO WALK AWAY?

Dinner Boo Boo

2009-02-26T23:33:00.004+08:00

Mummy made noodles for my dinner tonight and I brought it out to the dining table. I also saw that she left a bowl of pai kuat and sausages in another bowl so I took that out with me as well.

I popped a sausage into my mouth and started attacking the bowl of noodles. Damn hungry. It was already 10pm and I only had 1901 for lunch this afternoon.

"Kristy, what did you take out with you?" mummy shouts from the kitchen.

"The noodles and the bowl of meat lah!" I shouted back."

There was silence.

And then. "You ate from the bowl of meat arr?"

Me. "Why? I took a sausage lah"

"It's for the dog!"

"WHAT??? How was I suppose to know that!"

"The sausage was from 2 months ago lah, and can't you see the bones under it?"

I took a closer look into the bowl.

OH MY GAWWWWWWWWWD!!!!

I just ate dog food!!!!

Oh really??? Me???

2009-02-26T19:39:00.002+08:00

I was browsing through FB last night when a new notification came in.

XKCX has tagged you in a photo

and I was thinking....hmmm, XKCX XKCX XKCX, who is XKCX....and I even had to go into her profile to see her profile pictures to remind myself who XKCX is. And since I don't even remember who this person is exactly, how can this person have a picture of me?

This....

was what the picture was....

and when I rolled my curser over it,

THIS....

was what I was tagged as!

THE DRAMA QUEEN

REALLY???

ME???

A DRAMA QUEEN???

NO WAAAAAAAAY......

I wonder what I ever did to create that impression to someone I hardly even know.

It's amazing...

2009-02-22T17:18:00.000+08:00

...how I can now sing to every song on PlayHouse Disney >_<'

I'm so doomed

2009-02-20T20:36:00.003+08:00

I knew I was doomed the day I got pregnant.

Not because I wasn't ready for a child although at that time, I really wasn't ready. I mean, honeymoon was suppose to be in May, and then after that only try for a child but then I found out I was with child in January and it was all because I miscalculated and....anyways, that's old story now.

Not doomed because my body was gonna bloat up. Well, I wasn't looking forward to having wider hips because my hips then was already wide and all but then again, all women will have to bloat up when pregnant and anyways, I got my body back to the way it was and in fact I'm lighter than before I got pregnant and I lost so much weight that even my double-eyelid-less eye has miraculously formed a double-eyelid whoopeee! which just goes to show how much oil and fat I lost just from my face alone and YES, I AM GLOATING....teeeheehee!

I knew I was doomed because....

You know how everyone has a fear of something? And as you all know if you've been following this blog, my biggest fear is for the four-legged, translucent brown, clammy cold thing you people call a lizard which I don't think it even deserves to have a name but anyways, yes, this lizard thing and I have been on-going enemies for the longest time and no matter how much I try to tell myself that there's nothing much to fear about them, I will continue to be afraid of the disgusting things for the rest of my life and there's nothing much anyone can do about it (this sentence is too long I don't know how to end it).

My other fear is cooking.

I know right.

Cooking.

Like duh, cooking?

Cooking. Lizard. Cooking. Lizard. Cooking.

Okay, fine, to be fair to the lizards, I don't actually fear fear cooking. I more like fear the whole process of cooking. Preparing the ingredients. Putting them into the wok. Having oil spit out from the firery pit onto my hands and singe-ing me. And then having the food taste pathetic after the whole process. That fear.

So because of this fear, I never attempted to cook. Well, once in a while I do but nothing interestingly enough to cause a fire in the kitchen and most of the time when I DO have to cook (like making maggi mee or boiling rice), I use the good ol' microwave.

Oh yes, I absolutely LURVE the microwave! Without it, I would never be able to fry eggs, or boil rice, or make instant noodles and etc!

So, you would think, don't like to cook, scared to cook then don't cook lah, right?

I thought so too.

Until I got pregnant. But then, I pushed it away and told myself to cross the bridge only when I get to it.

And then, 2 weeks ago, when I brought Renee for her check-up, her pediac tells me, the next time you come, I will talk to you about bubur for Renee and being the moron that I am, I ask back, what's bubur?

You should have seen the look on FattyHubby's face. It wasn't nice.

Porridge???!!!

OH.MY.GAWD!!!!

I DO NOT KNOW HOW TO MAKE PORRIDGE!!!!!

Why can't Renee just drink breastmilk and live on rice cereals forever?

It's just as good as eating bubur right?

They even sell rice cereals with bananas / pears / apples / or whatever you want they have so why would I need to do any cooking?

Who says boiling porridge does not constitute as cooking? I wil shoot anyone who tells me that okay. I swear I will!

I have to wash the rice right?

I have to put it in a pot, put in the right amount of water and set it to boil right?

It has fire involved right?

Confirm die!

BestieKat called me few days ago and I decided to unburden my woes onto her and what does she do? She LAUGHS at me! Hmph!

And then, she offered to demonstrate it for me one day when I go over to her place. But WHY CAN'T I USE THE MICROWAVE???? I wailed.

Because it won't be as tasty as doing it the right way. Besides, using microwave is not healthy.

Tasty? Babies can't taste. If they could, they wouldn't have invented all sorts of different flavored rice cereals right?

But the one point that hit me was 'not healthy'.

And because of that, I'm doomed.

Doomed to boil porridge for Renee from now onwards.

Oh, the sacrifices a mother makes for her child!

This spoilt my day

2009-02-17T16:32:00.007+08:00

O.M.G!!!!

I read this post on Cheesie's blog and now, I want to commit suicide. The stupid picture of the lizrad is stuck in my head and I can't get it out and just writing about it now is making me want to puke. That's why I want to commit suicide. I'd rather die than to have the image of the damn thing flashing in my mind every 5 seconds....and there it goes again.

Omg, if I found something as disgusting like that in my kitchen sink, I think I would just freak! And I don't think I would be as cool as Cheesie and just go on with life and do other things in the house while the lizard is still lying in the kitchen sink lorr. I think I would just zone out and stand there frozen like a dungu until someone comes and do something about it.

But knowing me, I won't freeze like dungu lorr.

I think the first thing I'd do would be to scream and jump back then slip on the floor mat and fall flat on my face and break all my teeth.

Either that or I'd turn on the tap and try to flush it down the sink, but then, it will get stuck in the teeny weeny sink hole and its tail will fly off and it might start scrambling to break free and watching it do that will make me scream and jump back, slip on the floor mat, fall flat on my face and break all my teeth.

The best would be that while its stuck in the teeny weeny sink hole, I'd turn on the tap so that water will gush out stronger and hopefully, the lizard will eventually get sucked through and then all its guts would come splurting out and the egg will be smashed into a million pieces too and that would do the world good because not only did I kill one lizard, I killed all its children too so how about that!

Or, of course, I could just sneak up on it while it stays there not knowing its impending death and spray it with sheltox and it wouldn't be able to run anywhere except round and round the sink because it would be too slippery for it to climb out and so, I'll just keep spraying round and round the sink until the lizard runs to its death...teeheehee.

Watching it writher to death would absolutely make my day *BIG GRIN*

But I don't think any of this would happen. Instead, I would stand there screaming for someone to get rid of it and mummy will come in and try to help the lizard get out from the sink. And when the lizard does manage to clamber out, I'll jump back, slip on the floor mat, fall on my face and break all my teeth. It's my destiny.

Here's a hello from Renee to cheer you up....

and yes, you ARE gorgeous just like your mummy =)

And here's a picture of the ugly lizard (courtesy of Cheesie) to spoil your day again....waakakakakaaaaa.......

Sometimes I wonder

2009-01-13T16:35:00.002+08:00

Sometimes I wonder
Where you are
Its been so long since I've seen you
My life has moved on quite far
If you don't already know
I'm married to a wonderful man
And a gorgeous daughter
We have to show
My life is now quite perfect
Compared to back then
I hope you've been well
And that your life is settled down
Because the way you were living
It was definitely jail bound
.
Sometimes I think back
On the way things were back then
How much laughter and joy we shared
How in discipline we lack
Five years we shared
Though we were only twelve
But it was in those growing years
That played such an important role
That these feelings we cannot shelve
.
I was so young and naive back then
And openly trusted and believed in everything you did
I gave you all I had
And you turned back with nothing in hand
You took advantage of me
And the kindness me and my family bestowed on you
I never knew someone could be so cunning
So mean, deceiving and untrue
.
Many lessons I learnt
Throughout the time we had
And these lessons I carry with me till today
To prevent my heart and feelings again from being hurt and burnt
Although I hate what you did to me
I still want to thank you
For making me into the person I am
Stronger, more confident and not easily lied to
.
Which is why no matter what happened
It is now all in the past
History it remains
All bound up in my memories in a cast
And so at times I still think of you
Of memories shared in the past
I wish life has been great for you
As it has been for me since I saw you last
Perhaps one day we'll meet when I've discovered
That everything you did to me has been forgiven
Until then, I will sometimes still wonder
If you are still alive and happily living.

This is me....

2008-12-27T01:49:00.002+08:00

...enjoying my cupcakes!!!
.
.
CHEERS to that!!! =)

Updates....heehee

2008-12-23T19:50:00.001+08:00

FattyHubby called the doc to ask cos I was crying on the phone non-stop.

And guess what!

She said I can eat two.

ONLY two.

But it's still two.

Which is still better than none.

So this Christmas isn't gonna be that bad after all.

*BIG grin*

I cannot live like that lah

2008-12-23T16:00:00.003+08:00

O.M.G!!!!

Remember how just in my last post I mentioned that this Christmas is gonna be the best Christmas ever???

NOT!!!!

*sniff*sniff*

Renée is down with a slight virul infection and is going through slight purging, so I have to change my diet for a bit until she's ok. Meaning...

No spicy food!

No fried oily stuff!

No alcohol!

No dairy products!

cos I'm breastfeeding mah...

When the doc told me about this over the phone earlier, I was so cool and okay with it cos it didn't sink in yet. I didn't realize it yet.

And then later, when I was on the phone with FattyHubby telling him about it (gosh, I can't believe I'm crying as I'm writing this now), it sunk in.

NO DAIRY PRODUCTS!!!

Which means that I cannot have cupcakes!!!!

And I ordered 50 cupcakes from Naj-Cupcakes.blogspot.com for Christmas because they are so absolutely yummy and have been looking forward to eating them....and now....I can't!

NAD!!! Do you use butter in your cupcakes???

Because if you do, DON'T!!!!

Then I won't be able to eat.

Then I'll have to stare at everyone else eating your delicious cuppacakes and not be able to touch any.

And on CHRISTMAS DAY TOO!!!!

How am I suppose to stay away from those cupcakes???!!!

I can't I can't I can't!!!

I'll die.

I'll just crumble down and die.

On.The.Spot.

No cupcakes?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO............

My world is falling apart.

It's crumbling down now around me.

And I can see cupcakes everywhere.

Taunting me. Teasing me.

But not coming anywhere near me.

*sniff*sniff*sniff*

I can't write anymore....
My tears are blurring my visuals.

I know I damn drama.

But that's because you're not the one that has to abstain from cupcakes, okay!

So gimme a break!

And let me wail as much as I want to about my cupcakes!!!

Like for real???!!!

2008-12-22T23:59:00.002+08:00

Three weeks ago, I hopped on the weighing machine.

And 46kgs bleeped back at me.

Yesterday, I hopped on it again.

And I told myself, it's probably still at 46.

It's been at 46 since the pass 2 months.

But shockingly....

44kgs

bleeped back at me!

44 yah!!!!

That's like lighter than my PRE-pregnancy weight wei.

And I almost fell off the machine in shock.

I mean, it's not like as if I've been on a diet or anything.

In fact, I've been eating more than normal.

Breastfeeding = high metabolism = hungry all the time.

Seriously, I eat more than FattyHubby and even my grandma said that I was JUICY.

In fact, I even finished up RM8.40 worth of chicken rice.

When Jojo went to tapow for me, even the ChickenRiceMan was like, "Huh, so big packet??!!"

But there it was. In all its glory. Bleeping back at me. 44kgs.

Isn't it great?!!!

This is like the BEST Christmas present I've ever given myself ever!!!

And the best thing is, I didn't even have to work hard for it!!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!!

You know you love me *grins*

I want so many things

2008-12-19T18:28:00.004+08:00

Lately, I've been going to Pavilion a lot.

Like A LOT.

Cos it's the ONLY shopping mall in entire KL & PJ that has not one but TWO baby rooms on every single freaking level.

Salute to the person who designed Pavy.

Two weeks ago, I tottered into Charles & Keith and couldn't resist getting a pair of...

Yup!

For only RM159.90.

And I love it to death.

Actually, I love Charles & Keith.

And I hope they open more outlets soon so I don't have to keep going back to Pavy just to browse through their new stocks every 2 weeks.

But then again, I like Pavy.

And then, this week, Charles & Keith started their sales of up to 50% discounts.

And I went again only to walk out with nothing.

Not because I didn't see anything that I liked.

But because there were too many people. I had a huge stroller to push around. There was not much space for me to park the stroller to slowly look at items on sale. And I was in the way of everyone.

Of cos, I was with Sarah and we could have had taken turns to look after the stroller OUTSIDE the boutique but...

2 girls...

1 fav shoe shop on sale...

You do the maths.

So, I'm planning on going back again.

Cos I damn cannot tahan the fact that C&K is on sale and I didn't buy anything.

But this time, I'll drag FattyHubby along with me.

So he can look after his daughter while I take my time going through everything.

Brilliant idea, isn't it.

Now, the only thing I have to do is to con FattyHubby into accompanying me to Pavy.

Which is NOT going to be easy.

******

Christmas is coming and I'm so excited!!!

Cos I'm thinking I'll be getting loads of nice pressies this year.

Well, I'm hoping anyways.

Here's a list of what I HOPE I'll be getting:

1. The new Sony Ericsson X1 *fingers & toes crossed*

2. A bright RED refridgerator for our new house =)

3. Clothes clothes clothes and MORE clothes

4. CASH!!!!

5. That job offer I've been waiting for

6. The Ting Ting's CD

7. A maid

8. A brand new set of kitchen cabinets

*BEAMS WIDELY*

*thinks*

*double thinks*

*sighs*

Wishful thinking....

I think out of that list, only #3 & #6 will come true.

Oh well....

One can still dream...

Wtf?

2008-12-13T21:35:00.002+08:00

I was just browsing through KinkyBlueFairy's blog and saw that she posted up this site and so, with nothing to do, I tried it lah.
.
And THIS was my result!!!
.
.
My blog's readability is ONLY at friggin' Elementary Level wei!
.
How can???
Must be because I stopped blogging about getting drunk and clubbing and partying and raving and fashion and only know how to blog about motherhood these days lah.
.
Sigh...
.
See. Even blogs are more happening than my life now.
.
But then...I tried the test on KennySia's blog and guess what?
.
.
Hehehehe.....
His result reads Elementary Level too!!!
And he has such a FAMOUS blog!
So I guess if mine and his same same....not so bad lah.
.
Ooooooooo.....Christmas is just around the corner and I so can't wait!
Eventhough I know that this year, in between singing carols and opening presents, I'd probably have to feed Renee and put her to sleep, but I'm excited all the same.
.
I guess because it's the first Christmas for Renee.
But MOSTLY, I think it's because I bought such FANTASTIC pressies for everyone this year!!! *grins widely*
.
Yes. I actually did proper shopping, buying personal things rather than just running into the nearest supermarket and grabbing 30 bottles of hand & body lotion to be given to everyone. So I'm very sure that this year, everyone would be genuinely in love with what I bought for them....I hope....well, they'd better cos I did put a lot of effort into shopping this year.
.
So FAMILY MEMBERS, if you're reading this and you don't like what I bought you, then you might as well drown in shame now because I went to buy personal gifts for each of you while having to lug a screaming wailing crying machine with me, OKAY!!! So gimme a break! And I'd better be getting back equally good presents from you because NONE of you have to lug a screaming wailing pooping machine with you (except for CuzMich, CuzCheryl and CuzNette).

Cabin Fever

2008-12-03T19:23:00.004+08:00

Was just going through the photo albums in my laptop and came upon these pictures. My goodness, I almost forgot about these events!
.

folding mooncakes boxes back when i was with Tai Thong. and yes, it falls under the JD of a public relations person

.
my skinniest moment!
in PD with Candy...girls weekend getaway! was soooooooo good!!!
.
look at my flat tummy!!!
i so wish my tummy was as flat again....sigh...
at rum jungle during our partying days
.
jack daniels party at upstairs, loft
i miss my hair soooo much!!!
why in the world did I decide to chop it all off when i got pregnant???!!!
.
celebrating CurvyShirley's bday
i had my hair straightened then...so nice!

******

One night, FattyHubby and I were having dinner in the back kitchen when a fly appeared and started zooming around our food. You know how irritating that is, right? It's like here you are, trying to have a peaceful dinner and then this thing goes around buzzing near your ears and your mouth and landing on the food.

So I got quite irritated lah and when the fly landed on the food cover, I took the table cloth and swiped at it and it died...HAHAHAHAHAHAH *evil laugh*......

I couldn't believe that I have not lost my skills in catching flies. And it felt so good to see the thing dead on the table.

Ok lah, maybe it wasn't dead but it sure was unconscious and it gave me more joy to pick it up with a paper nakin and squeeze it between my fingers till there was a soft "ploosh". Ahhhh...the joys of killing pesky things (oh goodness, I'm looking at my daughter as I'm writing this! So super salah!).

FattyHubby was looking at me in shock when I started laughing happily after killing the fly. He must have been so shocked to know that his sweet little house wife had such an amazing skill.

"Hmph...wait till you see me catch flies with my bare hands. You'll be even more amazed", I gloated, grinning at him from ear to ear.

What I did not know was that I looked like a crazy woman. My hair was in a mess. I was wearing my most tattered of pyjamas. There was chocolate ice-cream stuck on my front teeth and I was waving the chocolate covered spoon about, grinning like a toothless witch and going on and on about how I could catch flies with my bare hands.

He was still staring at me. And then he slowly said, "Why don't you go out tomorrow? Take the baby out or whatever but just leave the house".

I stared at him blankly.

"I think you're having cabin fever".

Finally...

2008-11-25T23:00:00.001+08:00

I've posted up my pre-anniversary blog....so happy!

It's been ONE hell of a year!

2008-11-24T11:07:00.004+08:00

I was suupose to post up a pre-anniversary blog before this but I still haven't finished it so this will have to come up first. So look out for it soon!

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO US BOTH!!!

Yes, it's been ONE year!!!

Nov 24, 2007 - Our BIG day

Jan 8, 2008 - We found out that I was pregnant (so fast!!!)

Jan 11, 2008 - Our trip to Krabi. It was suppose to be a pre-honeymoon thing but ended up being our actual honeymoon and puked throughout the whole trip. SO much for a honeymoon.

Feb & Mar, 2008 - I was on complete rest in bed due to complications and FattyHubby had to give out angpows himself.

Apr 2008 - The blood test scare!

Jun 2008 - My birthday!!! And Renée's baby shower

Aug 2008 - The emergency C-sec delivery of our baby girl, Renée Elisabeth Lim Yi Cheeng. Followed by FattyHubby's 30th birthday!

Sept 2008 - CONFINEMENT!!!

Nov 2008 - Our 1st Anniversary

I love you, sweetheart, and always will.

I know I'm a hard person to live with and you always have to put up with my temper tantrums but you're the only man I've ever met who could deal with me and my shit and still laugh about it and for that, I thank GOD everyday for making you such a permanent part in mylife.

XOXO

How I Met Your Father

2008-11-18T22:34:00.015+08:00

Feb '02 - CNY

All the lights were on and there was merry-making sounds in the air as different groups of people crowded at seperate tables, gambling away small amounts of money and laughing and joking with each other.

At one table were ButtercupTjin's childhood friends, all happily playing a game of BlackJack and screams of "Picture! Picture" could be heard. Most of them were guys, a few girls, all of whom I got to know through my ex (who went to college with them) and ButtercupTjin. It was a bit akward for me to join them, seeing as I was now dating my ex's friend and these group of people knew about it and they weren't very happy with me for leaving the ex and going out with his friend.

.
And I felt a little bit of guilt as well. But oh well, relationships are relationships and breakups are bound to happen. Of course, the ex and I had broken up more than a year ago but you know how friends can be. Fiercely loyal. And so, I was seen as the evil bitch who tore their friend's heart apart and is now happily galivanting around with his friend.

At another table were ButtercupTjin's sisters and their friends, also deep into a serious game of mahjong. Couldn't join them either because the only people I knew in that group were the sisters. And I wasn't one to go waltzing in to interrupt their game of mj. Besides, I didn't know anything about the game.

Instead, Des (my bf) and I were seated with ButtercupTjin's colleagues from the HitzFM cruisers around her coffee table in the living room. They were a bunch of crazy people all right, and I felt right in place with them. Among them was this Chinese guy (whom I later got to know was called SK whom later became my FattyHubby) whom everyone was calling "Mad Chinaman". I don't know why I was never officially introduced to him then, perhaps because there were too many people around or perhaps it didn't cross ButtercupTjin's mind.

.
Whichever it was, I was kind of glad that we were not introduced because I didn't like the look of this guy and he came across as arrogant and sombong and the last thing I wanted was to make polite conversation with someone that looked like that.

I didn't give him much thought after that night because as far as I was concerned, I was never gonna see him again.

Aug '02 - Souled Out, Sri Hartamas

I was wrong.

It was ButtercupTjin's birthday and Des and I were late for her dinner. We rushed up the stairs and upon reaching the top, I scanned the area, looking for the table with the biggest group of people through the dim lights. There they are! Naturally, seated right in front of the DJ's deck.

As we made our way there, the first person my eyes alighted upon was HIM. Gosh! He looked as smug as ever and he didn't even bother to say 'Hi' when we got there. Not even a damn smile. Well, heck him. I don't need a snob to spoil my night. Besides, I was there for ButtercupTjin and not anyone else.

I didn't know why everyone was teasing him and making him down more alcohol. It was like as if people actually thought he was fun to hang out with. As if! And all the while, he just sat there, his short hair sleeked back, looking smugly at everyone else through small evil looking eyes.

Sheesh. What a loser. Why was ButtercupTjin even hanging out with someone like him?

Apr '05

After 4 years of being together and thinking that we were going to be married, Des and I broke up. My bad. And I was pretty heartbroken about the whole thing. Cause I felt so shitty about it. And it is NEVER nice to be the one to end a relationship.

BlossomMich decided to get me out of my hole and dragged me to Souled Out to have a heart-pouring session with her and ButtercupTjin. You know, one of those BFF sessions where we had each other's shoulders to cry on, in this case, I needed their shoulders to cry on.

It was a welcome change for me as I have not had the chance to meet up with them since the break-up and as I was in dire need to drown my sorrows with the 2 bestest people in the world, I agreed to crawl out after work to have dinner and drinks with them.

BlossomMich was already there when I arrived and she managed to secure us a small table. Enough for 3 girls to sit and drink and bitch about all the nasty Malaysian men in the world. Or so that was what I thought.

"Tjin called. Said Josh is coming along....BUT...," she added when she saw my face fall. "...he'll have friends joining him so they'll be seated at a different table. Don't worry," she leans over to hug me, "you don't have to pour your heart out in front of anyone else".

Thank goodness. I wasn't ready to have someone else sit down and listen to me moan and groan about my fucked up love life.

Boy, was I wrong again!

Josh sat down at our table with the 3 of us and he sat there for 2 hours plus straight!!! Why? Because his 'friends' that were suppose to come meet him were late, RUDELY late, and the 'friends' was none other than the arrogant, snobbish Mad Chinaman!

Gosh! Already I didn't like the guy. Now, I hated him even more! Because of him, I had to pour out my entire life story (well, 4 years of it anyways) and cry my eyes out in front of my friend's boyfriend. All dignity gone. Just like that. Because HE decided to be late!

When he finally did arrive, sauntering in like as if the whole world was in his hands, I was staring daggers at him. Stupid grin on that stupid face. If I could, I would slap that smirk off his face and plaster it back on upside-down!

"Girls, this is SK," ButtercupTjin began the introductions. "Kris, you've met him before right?"

"Well, we were never properly introduced but don't bother," I muttered under my breath. "But yeah, I'm sure I've seen his face around before". Slap slap slap!

He pulled up a chair and sat down directly opposite me. Of ALL the places around the small table, he HAD to sit right opposite me! So I had no choice but to look straight on at that stupid smirk on that stupid face! Urgh!

And then. And then right, he HAD to give me his business card! Like for what??!! So that I can see what SK stands for? So that I can see what he works as? I DON'T WANT TO KNOW. THANK YOU!. BUT, because he stretched his hands out across the table to give me his business card, I had no choice but to reach into my bag and take mine out.

Of course, I could have lied and said I'm out of cards. Or that the office burnt down and my cards were burnt along with it. Or I çould have been honest and said I don't give out my cards to arrogant SOBs with stupid smirks on their stupid faces, but I did neither. Instead, I just pulled out a card from the case, plastered a smile on my face and said, "Here, have mine".

"Thanks!", he took my card. "Would you like a drink?"

"No thanks," I turned to BlossomMich. "I'm gonna make a move. Early day tomorrow".

BlossomMich got up with me. "Yeah, I'll make a move too".

I flashed her a grateful smile. At least it didn't look like I was the only one who wanted to get away from this whole scene as soon as possible. And hello, I was still suppose to be the heartbroken-just broken up with bf of 4 years-scoundrel who did not deserve to have a drink. Des & are were gonna get married, for heaven's sake. We even started looking for a place together and things were so serious between us. And I was honestly upset with myself for not being able to stay in the relationship and work things out.

So, the last thing I need now is for Sombong to come and make my night worse. Who cared that he arrived late and therefore caused Josh to hear everything I had to wail about? Who cared that because of HIM, Josh now knows what a selfish, pathetic brat I am, going around breaking hearts? And who cared that I lost all dignity in front of Josh when I broke down in tears? Who cared anyways?

.
I wiped him out of my mind as I drove home, and crawled into bed to wallow in my own sadness.

A week later.

I was away in Cameron's for the weekend with some friends when my mobile bleeped with an incoming SMS.

HI. HOW ARE YOU? DO YOU REMEMBER WHO I AM? WHAT ARE YOU UP TO THIS WEEKEND? SK

Omg! What the hell was Arrogance doing texting me at this ungodly hour on a Saturday??!! And how the hell did he even get my number??!!

My first reaction was to speed-dial ButtercupTjin's number.

"Woman! Why did you give SK my number???!!!," I wailed into the phone without giving her a chance to even say anything.

"I did not!!!," she wailed back.

"Then how the HELL did he get it???!!!"

"Erm...you exchanged name cards. Duh."

Silence.

"Oh. That's right. We did, didn't we?" Damn! And I actually forgot? How in the world did I forget? "Sorry arr," I continued sheepishly, my voice much softer now.

Darn! This means that I can't pretend that I never got the SMS because my number was CLEARLY printed out on the card directly under my name and there was no way I could act all "Oh, cleary Tjin must have given you the wrong number". I cursed myself and replied.

OF COS I RMBR YOU! WE MET LAST WK @ SOULED OUT. M @ CAMERONS W FRENZ NOW. HVE GD W/END. K

U HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND TOO. TAKE CARE. SK.

I didn't reply. So he had no reason to SMS me anything else. And so, I had peace for 3 days. It never occured to me that he was interested in asking me out because I would never in the world dream of going out with him, and therefore, naturally, he would not have gotten any signals from me about being interested in return.

After spending 3 days up in Camerons (without thinking of anyone else and having as much fun as I could), I returned to KL, and back to reality, to a black-out house. Sigh...and to think that after spending 3 days up in nice fresh cold air, I could at least bury myself in my air-conditioned room. But no. Tenaga HAD to be up to their tricks again. As usual. And I DID NOT want to stay home and be food to the mosquitoes either. And so, I made plans to meet up with ButtercupTjin and BlossomMich at Breakers in Sri Hartamas for drinks and a few games of pool.

Okay, at this point in my life, after it's been officially announced that I was single and available and am once again back on the market, there were a few bums always hanging around, trying their luck. There was Andy, Bryan, Edmund, Perry...bla bla bla...and then, there was Tom.

Tom Tom the piper's son....no, not really. I don't know who his dad is but I'm very sure he ain't a piper. All I knew was that Tom was the one that hung around the most. It's like every-friggin-where I go, he was there. He was like a pesky fly I couldn't get rid off, no matter what repellent I used. Exactly like one of those stupid candles that won't go off no matter how hard you blow at it. Yeah, that was how Tom was.

And I really cannot remember the sequence of events but somehow, Tom was there that night with us at Breakers, and he was driving BlossomMich up the wall, tyring to be the Mahaguru of Pool and all that. Whatever. And then, Andy showed up, apparently, to 'surprise' me. Like I needed it. Yah-huh.
.
And like as if that wasn't enough, to my utter horror and dismay, SK sauntered in after that, like as if he knew all along we were gonna be there and it was okay for him to join us. NO, it was NOT okay, but I didn't say that aloud as he was still ButtercupTjin's colleague and I did not want to put her in a spot.
.
BlossomMich and ButtercupTjin were furiously whispering to each other at another corner and I could tell that they were up to some mischief. When they saw me approaching them, they immediately straightened up and pretended to discuss about pool strategies. Ya right. For all the years I've known them, I've NEVER in my life seen 'strategies' in the same sentence as their names.
.
"What's up?" I asked casually, eyeing the pool game that was going on between SK and...ahem....yours truly. It was his turn and so, I used the opportunity to join the girls for a little bit of gossip.
.
"So, you ever plan on dating again?" BlossomMich casually asked and I could see ButtercupTjin stiffling a giggle.
"What's this about? Of course I wanna date again. Only if the RIGHT person comes a long", I sneaked a peek at SK from the corner of my eyes, watching how his eyebrows come together as he mentally forms his next move. "Why?"
"Would you like someone serious....or someone like funny?" ButtercupTjin asked.
"Well, obviously someone who can be both funny and serious," I replied and went on to pocket a red ball. Ha!
"Why?" I asked when I joined them again after missing out on the blue ball.
"Oh nothing," they both grinned at me. "Concentrate on your game".
.
I gave them both the I-know-you're-up-to-something look and went back to the game. I had absolutely no idea what these girls were up to, but I knew they were scheming something alright. I could see it on their faces. But then, I decided to stop trying to find out because, it will come out sooner or later. These girls can't keep a secret from me for long.
.
May '05 - TGIF, Life Centre KL & Mambo Jumbo @ Velvet
.
Eversince Des and I broke up, I went partying with JamieLing every single night. Okay, not every single night, but every Weds, Thurs, Fris and Sats...like without fail! We would bring our clothes and make-up to the office with us, whip off our office suits right after office hours, jump into our party clothes, add on as much make-up as possible and then proceed to whichever joint we wanted. We would stay on until 2, 3am in the morning, go home, pass out and crawl out of bed like zombies from their graves the following morning only to repeat the same routine over again.

As usual, JamieLing and I were heading down to Mambo Jumbo as it was a Wed night but this time, ButtercupTjin, Josh and SK decided to join us there. I know why ButtercupTjin decided to come. She loves partying as much as I did. I know why Josh decided to come. He could never leave Tjin out of his sight for long. What I DON'T KNOW is why SK was coming along as well. But I wasn't gonna let him spoil my night out so I pretended not to bother when Tjin informed me.

I met up with ButtercupTjin and Josh for dinner at TGIF in KL first because JamieLing had something to do and will be meeting us up at Velvet later. SK. Well, he was SUPPOSE to come join us for dinner but by the time I was almost done with my beef quasedillas, there was still no sign of him.

I was starting to get a little upset about his 'punctuality'. This is definitely NOT the first time he's been late for something and I would never forget about it. We were supposed to meet JamieLing at the entrance to Velvet at 10pm and it was already 10.05pm. And she was already there. All alone. In a place filled with unpredictable people. Her life at risk. All because of someone who didn't know how to tell time with his watch!

"He's on his way", ButtercupTjin announced, after hanging up on her phone call with Mr. Punctuality.

"He was supposed to be on his way like 2 hours ago," I snapped back, thinking only about JamieLing, all alone, surrounded by wolves!

"Awww....c'mon, give him a break," Tjin cooed. "He's really nice. AND extremely hardworking. This is usually the time he leaves office. He's very dedicated to his work."

"Well, he knows we're going out tonight, couldn't he leave work a bit earlier? It's not like it will kill him right?" I was really annoyed.

Finally, after waiting another 10 minutes, the hardworker himself arrived, of course, apologizing non-stop as he sat down and flipped through the menu. Gawd! Now we had to wait for him to eat too???

I offered him the other half of my beef quasedilla, the half which I could not finish, hoping that he would take it and forget about ordering his own meal so that we could leave ASAP. But no. I should have known. He took my half of course. But he also proceeded on to order his own dinner. So much for wanting to leave and head over to Velvet TOGETHER.

"Ok, Jamie's already there. ALONE." I glared at SK as I picked up my bag. "So I think I'm gonna head over there first. You guys call me when you get there. Bye". I bent to kiss ButtercupTjin bye, waved to Josh and SK (urgh!) and left.

JamieLing was hopping from one leg onto the other by the time I got there, frantic and worried for being alone too long. It was already way pass 10.45pm and I decided we should go in first without waiting for the rest because knowing that SK had only JUST ordered his meal, they'd probably take another hour to arrive and NO WAY was I gonna wait outside Velvet for another hour.

Surprisingly, the three of them arrived in less than half an hour. SK must have gobbled down his dinner, I smirked to myself. Well, he deserved it.

JamieLing and I were still in the queue to go in when ButtercupTjin called me to inform me that they'd arrived and after finding out that we were still waiting in line, SK, the gentleman that he is (gags!) decided to open a bottle and got us in faster than I could say "Let's go!". And for that, I was grateful for him.

I hardly hung out in the same place as them. Instead, I was hopping around the club like a bunny, saying my hellos to practically everyone there who were MJ-kakis and strutting my stuff up on the podium. So I never really got the chance to say my thanks to SK for the bottle and for getting us in so quickly.

Which was WHY (I would like to think), when I asked him how much I owed him for the bottle and when he said "Buy me dinner instead", I nodded in agreement.

Oh dear girl, what have I done?

.
June '05 - Sri Ayuthaya, Damansara Heights

Eversince that night out to Mambo Jumbo, SK had been calling me everyday, just to talk. About stuff. About everything under the sun. And moon. And stars.

It was so often that even I got used to the routine of waiting for his name to flash on my mobile whenever he called. It was always around 7-ish in the evening, after working hours. Sometimes, I would chat with him from the office. Sometimes, on my way home. And sometimes, if I left office early, lying in bed. And I started to enjoy these little conversations with him. Once I got to know him a little better, he really wasn't as bad a person as I made him up to be.

He was funny. He said things that made me laugh until my sides ached. I also found out from our little conversations that he was very much indeed dedicated to his job (as ButtercupTjin had tried to tell me earlier), came from Penang, had an older brother and was now on a journey looking for his one true love.

Call me perasan, but deep down inside, I kind of had a feeling that I was one of his choices for his 'one true love', but since he never told me how he felt about me, I never said anything. To me, we were just friends. Simple as that. Besides, I still wasn't ready to go dating again.

Anyways, it was my birthday and I decided to ask SK out for dinner. 1. I owed him dinner for the bottle he bought at MJ so many months ago. 2. He wanted to take me out for my birthday so I decided to kill 2 birds with 1 stone. 3. I felt like Thai. 4. I wasn't up to going out with Andy or Bryan or Edmund or Perry or Tom or anyone of those guys.

So we decided on a date and he picked me up from work and we headed to Sri Ayuthaya in Damansara. It was close to home for him and also convenient for him to drop me off to take my car which I left at the office.

Surprisingly, dinner went well. I was sick for the whole week before this and lost my voice and I still had not gotten my whole voice back so I still sounded like half frog half man. But yes, I had cravings for Thai. To hell with getting my voice back.

"Did you leave anything important in the car?" he asked me after we'd ordered our dishes.

"Erm...yeah, my camera. But it's ok. I don't need it".

"No lah, don't think it's safe to leave it in the car. Will go get it", he excused himself.

Well, okay. I didn't think anyone would wanna break into his precious car just to take my camera but if he was that paranoid, I wasn't gonna say anything about it.

.
Conversation was minimal throughout dinner. 1. Because my voice made me sound like a complete idiot so I decided not to talk too much. 2. He was acting all gentlemanly-soft spoken-bla bla. 3. I was too busy enjoying my Thai food. Yummers!

I bought dinner of course. Only RM99. Haha! And what a good dinner too! When we got to his car, he held the door open for me and there, at the foot of the front passenger seat, I saw a box. Ooooh....it finally dawned onto me that he wasn't paranoid about someone breaking into his car to steal my camera. He used it as an excuse to surprise me with a birthday present! How sweet!

I beamed at him. "Aww...you shouldn't have!"

"Well, I hope you like it. I didn't know what to get for you and spent quite a long time deciding on this", he stammered nervously.

"Okay," I picked the box up and placed it in my handbag. "I'll open it when I get home. Thanks a lot. You shouldn't have gone through all that trouble".

He asked me to call him when I got home, just to let him know that I was safely home so when I did get home, I decided to open his present to me before calling him, so that I could also thank him for it and tell him how nice it was. So, I jumped on the bed and opened the box. It was a dainty silver necklace from Perlinis. And it was really pretty. And sweet. But. Just. NOT. Me. Actually. SO NOT ME. It was just something that I wouldn't wear. Unless if I were going for a dinner or something. Yeah.

Oh gosh, this is gonna be one akward pone call.

I dialed his number, took a deep breath and plastered on my brightest smile (because one can hear if you're smiling through the phone). "HI!!!" Darn! A bit too loud. "I'm home!" I lowered down the tone of my voice. "And thanks a lot for the necklace," I smiled wider. "I absolutely LOVE it!".

"You do?" he asked back, sceptical.

To lie or not to lie. Sigh....

"Actually, it's not really something that I would wear on an everyday thing....BUT," I added. "I would definitely wear it for a formal dinner function or something. So yeah, I do...erm...like it".

"You sure or not?" came his reply.

"Yes yes yes. Anyways, I'm home safe. Had a good time. And thanks for the present. Will talk to you tomorrow. Nights!" I hung up before I had to lie even more.

Lying down on the bed, I held the necklace up and watched it twinkle under my room flouracent lights. Actually, it IS quite nice. Nothing like my usual chunky neckwear but it's something different from the stuff I had. It's not that bad. I put it around my neck, stared at my reflection in the mirror, smiled at myself, kept the necklace back in its box and went to take my shower.

Jul '05 - The Loft Zouk

"Happeeeee Birthday, sweetheart!"I yelled over the loud music as I threw my arms around HotTemperJinee. "What a party!".

BeerDrinkingHeather & HotTemperJinee

.
I turned to scan the place, all the while waving now and then to people I know and people that looked familiar. I spotted BlossomMich on a couch at a corner and waved to her. BeerDrinkingHeather, who came with me, was already hopping around, helping herself to drinks. From afar, I spotted someone in a red T-shirt, chatting away with a group of people. He didn't see me, but my heart skipped a beat.

BeerDrinkingHeather, BlossomMich, JamieLing & me

It was him.

I had not seen him since our dinner together in Sri Ayuthaya, only spoke on the phone. But even those phone conversations dwindled down to once a week because it was either I was too busy to talk or he was. So when I saw him, it felt weird because it was like seeing a friend that you have not seen for such a long time and I wasn't sure if we could still click as well as before.

Well, whatever.

I walked over to him and his group of friends, people I met from ButtercupTjin's CNY open house before, smiling my hellos. Then I turned to SK and enveloped him in a casual hug. I could already tell that he had consumed quite a bit of alcohol and in his hand was another jug of Long Island Tea. And yes, he was drinking by the jugs.

"Hi. Just got here?" I asked, knowing full well that he didn't.

"No. Was here about an hour ago", he replied. Duh!

"Yeah well, I'll go back to join my friends. See ya!" It was weird because he looked like he didn't really wanted to talk to me and we were surrounded by his friends who were giving me the 'look', so I left and went over to join BeerDrinkingHeather, BlossomMich and JamieLing who just arrived.

It was fun. Well, I had fun anyways. It's been a long time since I've been out with the girls and I've always enjoyed partying with them. After a few drinks, and as the night wore on, the DJ started spinning really good music and the dancer in me started showing. Soon, we were on the dance floor, letting our hair loose and swinging our bodies to the beat. Before I knew it, we were surrounded by a bunch of Malay dudes who definitely were not there for BadTemperJinee's birthday.

One of them, the boldest of the lot, came really close behind me and started grinding me. I threw a dirty look at the girls and moved away but this dude kept following me! Gosh! I moved away again and AGAIN, he followed me. Like, couldn't he read body language? Seriously.

But before I could move away again or turn around and slap him in the face, Allen, one of SK's friends, came up to him and said, "Jangan kacau dia. Ini...," he pointed to SK who was directly behind him. "...boyfriend dia. Respect lah".

Being big, tall and mean looking, Allen made quite a scary picture and anyone with a sane mind would not have wanted to upset him. Thank goodness Mr. Grinder had a sane mind and backed away immediately. Only to have SK replace him.

No no no.....SK did not grind me. SK just really took the 'duty' of being pretend-boyfriend seriously and started dancing close to me, making sure that nobody else would come grind me. He even got my drinks for me and he was being really nice. And I actually enjoyed it. Eventhough I knew deep down, he probably had no idea what he was doing because he was so NOT sober.

How sure was I that he was not sober?

Well, it came to a point where he suddenly hugged me from behind and said, "Tonight you're mine and mine alone. For once, I do not have to share you with all the other guys out there".

he stole a peck on my cheek when i counted till 3

Yup. That was how I knew.

And he basically kept true to his word. He kept me to himself the whole night, never letting me out of his sight even for a second and I allowed it. Too high on alcohol to fight him. And I didn't want to. Í would rather choose to be with him than to be grinded by those Malay dudes again. When he DID finally had no choice but to go to the bathroom, his big-bully-looking friend, Allen and his wife, Jo, took over.

25 years old and there were still people baby-sitting me. How nice.

"You know, SK really likes you", Allen said and Jo nodded in agreement. "Seriously".

"Uh-huh".

"Trust me. We have NEVER seen his face light up the way it does whenever your name is mentioned".

"Uh-huh".

"He turns into a fucking lightbulb!".

"Uh-huh".

"He truly likes you, he does," his word was final.

And then I turned around, and saw the object of our discussion, getting down and dirty with a sexy long-haired girl in a little black dress. I turned back and raised an eyebrow at Allen. "Uh-huh".

"Okay okay...this does not count. He's drunk".

"Uh-huh". I turned to look at SK again nd I couldn't believe myself but I thought I felt a faint stirring of jealousy. Oh gosh, was I jealous? I shook my head and shook the feeling away and looked at him again. He had stopped dancing and was looking back at me. I threw him a smile and walked away.
.

I hung out with the girls for the rest of the night, dancing and laughing ourselves silly. I did not allow myself to think about SK again, even though he came over to me every now and then. At the end of the night, when the lights came on and the DJ started spinning slow beats, BeerDrinkingHeather and I said our goodbyes and headed out the door.

"Wait! Wait!"

I turned around to see SK slowly making his way towards me. So drunk. I waited.

"Let me walk you to the car," he slurred.

"No, it's ok. Heather's going back with me and Jamie's car is parked next to mine so we'll be walking to the car together," I said, and took a closer look at him. "Did you drive?"

"No. Allen, Jo and I took the cab here".

"Ok," I nodded. "Be safe. Night!"

"No no no. I'm serious. Let me walk you girls to the car"."

BeerDrinkingHeather threw him a look. "Boy, we 3 girls stand a higher chance of defending ourselves without you following us".

He still looked at me.

"Ok, fine. Tell you what. I'll call you when I get to the car. How bout that?" I said.

He looked at me once more and then finally gave in. "Ok. Make sure you call me. But only after you get in the car and locked the doors".

I laughed. For a drunk person, he was still pretty concerned for my safety. Bonus point. I nodded, hugged him goodnight and left.

By the time we reached our cars at the open-aired carpark opposite, I think SK had called me more than 3 times, each time asking me the same thing. "Have you got to the car yet?"

"This guy REALLY have the hots for you, huh", BeerDrinkingHeather laughed at me. I just laughed back, thinking about him.

3 days later - mamak in Sri Petaling

Breakfast with SK.

His version of apologizing and buying me breakfast and also to get the details on what happened at BadTemperedJinee's party. He couldn't remember a thing. He actually had the nerves to look embarassed!

And he didn't even apologise for his behavior! Tsk tsk.

Instead, he said, "You know, a group of us are planning to go to Lang Tengah but none of us have been there before and they asked me to go recce the place".

I nodded. I could sense an invitation coming and I quickly started mentally preparing my reply to him.

"According to what I found out about the island, the waters are really clear. Like swimming pool clear," he continued.

Darn! How did he know about my weakness for beautiful beaches. And as he went on and on about how beautiful the island was, I began to imagine myself at the place itself, swimming in the clear blue waters, getting a golden tan, lying on a white sandy beach.....

Before I could stop myself, I heard myself saying "Yes!" to him when he asked me if I would like to go check out the island with him. Well, what the heck. Only RM300 for a 3d/2n stay at such a beautiful island, I didn't care if I'd just agreed to go with the devil!

Jul '05 - Lang Tengah

All I could say was gorgeous gorgeous GORGEOUS!!!

The island IS GORGEOUS!!!! The waters were as clear as he promised. The sand was as white as he promised. The people were nice and friendly. It was just perfect!

stopped at KT town for breakfast

We had the whole boat to ourselves from the mainland to the island because we left on a weekday and there weren't anyone else who booked themselves at the resort. So we played catching on deck, and I tripped and fell overboard into the deep waters.

on the boat

Gotcha! Hahahaha....

We DID have the whole boat to ourselves, but I was too tired from the 8 hours drive from KL to KT and I was also having a slight hangover as I was partying with JamieLing the same night we left. And I even offered to take the first drive so I was exhausted! So we didn't do much on the boat. Just sat in silence, made small chat and I was trying very hard to look as macho as possible eventhough my eyes were threatening to tumble down shut.

SK had the sense to book a room with TWO single beds and for that, I was quite happy. More bonus points! And I swear, NOTHING happened throughout the 2 nights we shared in the same room. Serious!

Even I was expecting something to happen, and brought the 'emergency kit' with me, but it remained in my bag because, like I said, nothing happened. Yes, he was very VERY much a gentleman. Surprising huh?

I was actually waiting for him to come out and confess his feelings for me since we were on such a gorgeous island and the ambience was perfect and it was so very romantic. But nothing happened.

Nothing UNTIL the time when we were having lunch and this other guy who was there on a company trip approached us and asked if SK and I were dating. We shook our heads and said we were just friends. And then the guy turned to SK and said, "Well then, good luck to you because when I get back from my snorkelling trip, we're gonna see who's the better man". Shocking huh? I bet SK never expected competition when he'd brought me so far away. So he had a few glasses of whisky and he got up the courage to tell me all.

feeding the fishes

I was dipping myself in the water, surrounded by colourful coral fishes, soaking in the evening sunlight when Mr. Slightly Tipsy himself came splashing into the water, scaring away all the fishes that were just a second ago swimming around peacefully. I squinted against the sunlight and watched him make his way towards me. I was actually in quite deep waters, sitting on a safety rope which the resort's management put up, warning swimmers not to swim pass the ropes as there were passing boats that went in and out after that. So by the time SK got to me, he was all wet, with hair plastered down on his forehead, water running down his face, his hair and even out his nostrils.

But he looked so damn adorable.

And when it hit me that I thought he looked adorable, I knew I was suckered.

He joined me on the rope.

"You know," he started and I couldn't stop myself from smiling. "I don't know if Tjin ever told you, but I've liked you for the longest time. Since the first time I saw you at her house during CNY".

"No....Tjin never mentioned anything," so Tjin knew and she NEVER told me??!!! That bitch! I am so gonna call her and scream at her!

"I guess she never told you cos you were going on so strong with your ex and when I showed interest in you, she told me not to even think about it," he explained. Okay, Tjin, you're forgiven.

"Okay....which is why you never said anything to me before?", I asked.

He nodded. "And then when we first started talking on the phone, you kept repeating about not being ready to see anyone else, so that kindda stopped me from saying anything as well".

Wow, respect. At least he was never pushy. More bonus points! *beams*

"So now you're telling me.....?" I let my question trail off, and he continued for me.

"Well, I like you. Very much. But I do not want to rush you into anything."

There was silence between us for a while as we stared off into the setting sun. Him probably anticipating what I had to say. Me? Well, a lot of things that were going on in my mind at the same time. I knew I kind of liked him, but not enough to go rushing into a relationship yet. I knew I enjoyed spending time with him and that we were compatible. But was it enough for me to get involved with him?

Finally, I turned to look at him.

"Where do you see this relationship going? Is it gonna be something long term or what?"

And without a moment's hesitation, he answered, "Well, I cannot guarantee you anything. Who knows, maybe few months down the road I might leave you for someone else".

Stupid cow.

A guy should never say that to a girl he's trying to kau lorr.

But it was that naive genuine reply that pulled my heart. Because any other guy would have answered, "I've thought about it and this will be forever lorr. You are THE one lorr." *rolls eyes*

I couldn't help laughing. "Oh, you leave me lah? Not I leave you issit?"

He laughed with me and after a while, there was silence again.

"Thanks," I said. "For not pushing me or rushing me into anything. But as I've said before, I'm still not ready."

He looked at me and smiled. "It's okay. You'll be ready when you are. Come, let's go back in and prepare for dinner. It's getting dark".

******

SK haunted my every waking moment and walked in all my dreams throughout the one week after we returned from Lang Tengah. And I couldn't help asking myself, will it really hurt to just give myself another go at another realtionship? He'd been waiting for me for 3 years and still is waiting. He's a good guy. My parents would absolutely love him.

And I loved being with him.

I enjoyed myself throughout the whole trip on the island and he really made me laugh. Was it so wrong to give myself another chance to happiness? To see if things worked out between us?

And so, on August 1st 2005, I called him and told him that, "Yes, I would very much like to go out with you".

And I've never been happier.

******
.

our 1st trip to cherating

our 2nd trip to cherating....

our 3rd....

and 4th...

and 5th....

and 6th...still counting...

...finally....7th....

on ochard rd, singapore, new year 05/06

christmas

valentine's

at 7atenine

cameron's

genting's

langkawi

maya hotel

pangkor

port dickson

penang

the day after he proposed

the proposal ring from deGem

redang

Fail

2008-11-13T21:40:00.003+08:00

Seriously, only mothers out there will understand that staying home to be a full-time mom HAS GOT TO BE the toughest job on the planet!

Shit.

I NEVER in my life expected my life to be like that. If I'd known, I'd have waited a little longer before ever deciding to have a baby.

Babies are not easy to deal with.

It's not the pooping or the feeding or the rocking to sleep or anything.

It's the CRYING!

Gosh!

And especially when they cry for no reason at all!

Or at least I don't think there's a reason for them to cry.

Diapers cleaned. Checked.

Hunger satiated. Checked.

Room temp just nice. Checked.

Baby's temp. Checked.

Tummy nice and soft. Checked.

Sleepiness. Checked.

Then WHY THE HELL ARE YOU STILL CRYING???!!!

I could cry with you.

Because I really don't know what you want.

And I've tried my best to comfort you in all ways possible.

And the worse thing is for a mother not to know what her child wants and to fail in comforting her child.

I'm a failure.

I'm ADDICTED!!!!

2008-11-09T15:20:00.003+08:00

to online shopping.
DIE!
now no need to go out also can go broke.
.
in 2 days, I've spent RM200 on 4 items already.
someone PLEASE take the internet away from me.
i'm hopeless!
.
someone should just take the internet, laptop AND my purse away from me. That way, I don't get tempted at all to spend any money. Better still, take my car keys and license too!
.
sigh....
this is what happens when I'm left all alone at my in-laws', with them fighting to carry Renee away from me and with nothing else to do.
.
FattyHubby has gone to check on the defects of our soon-to-be new home.
.
Oh, I SOOOOOOOO can't wait to move in!!!
.
No more of this hopping between my parents's place and my in-laws'. Hate it!

Torn

2008-11-05T19:40:00.002+08:00

This has got to be the most messed up day in my life.

Not messed up in a terrible kind of way. More in a mixed emotions dunno what to do kind of way. And it sucks. I hate being in a situation where I have no control over. Where I'm not as sure about decisions as I normally am. Where it involves me choosing between what is best for me and for someone I love.

The ONLY other time when I was put into this situation was on Nov 10th 2007. It was the most messed up day of my life. That is, before today. And no, I am not going to write about it because I'm just not going to.

Besides, it happened last year and I've already made the decision which led me to where my life is at the moment. So yeah, not gonna write about it. But that doesn't mean I can't think about it.

But I am going to write about why today is messed up.

No, it's got nothing to do with what daddy said about me on Monday night although I am still feeling the sting from it.

I mean, I'm 46kgs now, only ONE more kg to lose to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight and he called me fat. FAT.

FAT!

Anyways.....sigh....back to my messed up day today.

I got a call this afternoon. From a future employer. Asking me to go in for a meeting next Monday. And I was elated!

The thought of being back in the working world (like as if I disappeared for so long like that) just got me grinning from ear to ear just thinking about it. Being able to join in the peak hours traffic again. Having people around me to call colleagues. Lunch time! Earning my own income again. Getting to dress up for work. Walking around in the corporate world. The list just goes on.

Of course, as decided, I don't plan to start working till after CNY and after we've settled down in our new home, and when Renée is older and after I've weaned her off breastmilk.

But the thought of going back to work, gosh, is just fantastic!

I think the pass 2 months plus of staying home and looking after Renée has gotten to me and for someone like me, who can hardly stay in one place for too long, well, it's an accomplishment.

I love being with Renée. I love waking up to her and playing with her everday and watching her face turn red whenever she's about to cry. I love it when she crunches up her little nose whenever she tries to sneeze and nothing comes out. I love it when she passes explosive motions. When she smiles in her sleep and when she gives me the "Mummy looks like an idiot" look.

Which is WHY today is messed up. On one hand, I want to go back to work. To escape the 4 walls of the house. To earn my own income and to help take some pressure off FattyHubby in supporting the family.

On the other hand, I want to bring Renée up on my own. To see her different accomplishments everyday. To experience her little little new ways as she grows day by day. And I cannot CANNOT even tolerate the fact that if I go back to work, I would have to give her up to someone else to babysit for me. That someone else other than me will be the one spending more time with her. That someone else will be experiencing her little little new ways everyday. That someone else will be the one taking over MY role as mother when I go off to the office.

And I HATE the thought of her getting close to that someone else other than me. Sharing her smiles and laughter with someone else.

Yes, I am possessive.

But this is my daughter.

So I'm allowed to be.

I know. So many mothers out there give up their children to babysitters, and I envy them for being able to do it. I salute them. It takes great courage and sacrifice having to make the choice of doing that. And I don't know if I will ever be able to do that.

So it all boils down to making a choice.

Making the RIGHT choice.

Which is why I'm messed up today.

Fat jeans

2008-11-04T00:28:00.003+08:00

I'm so frustrated with FaceBook!!!

It's giving me soooo much problems just trying to upload pictures.

So until it stops giving me problems, nobody will be able to see updated pics of Renée.

Hmph!

I decided I felt like making a short trip to Pavilion tonight to look for my Zara stuff and decided to get mummy and daddy to come with me so they can help me look after Renée while I shopped. But then I called Zara Pavilion to check if they had what I wanted, they didn't.

"We don't have to go down to Pavvy tonight anymore," I told dad.

"Why?"

"They don't have what I want"

"What you want?"

"Jeans"

Dad looks me up and down and then snorts.

"What for? You so fat. Buy also no use lah".

Fat. FAT.

That was like a knife through my heart okay.

Not only did it pierce through.

But it was also a blunt knife.

And it was twisted as it pierced.

I am SOOOOO GOING ON A DIET!

Oh to spend or not to spend

2008-10-27T01:39:00.004+08:00

I ended up getting a funky plastic red GUESS? purse.

Kipling didn't have the design I wanted. And the ones in the boutique were similar to my lime green one. So why would I want to spend another RM500 on something that looks exactly like what I have now....except for the color.

Besides, GUESS? was having sale.

And I got my purse for cheaper.

Although I kindda regret getting it now.

Cause it's slim and after stuffing all my rubbish from the old purse into this new one, it's got problems buttoning up.

DAMN IT!

Actually, I couldn't make up my mind between the slim funky red plastic one and a thick vintage orange one.

In the end, I opted for the slimmer one cos it was classier.

I think I have a strong feeling I might go back and get the other one.

I've also set my eyes on a Coach =)

FattyHubby is gonna kill me.

Anyways, here are some latest pics of Renée.

I took these in the car last night while waiting for my Coffee Jelly Frappucino.

It's been AGES...

2008-10-23T21:55:00.003+08:00

...since my last entry.

I know. I know.

But like I said, I'm in a whole different ball game now.

24-7. Not 9 - 6 anymore.

Attempted my first outing with Renée to Pavilion on Monday.

Without the hubby.

Went there to meet Kat for lunch and to do a little shopping.

F-A-I-L-U-R-E!!!

Genius here decided to put Renée is a new stroller for the first time and obviously she wasn't used to it.

Wailed from the moment we arrived till the minute we left.

.
Thank goodness Kat was there to help me out else I would have died.

Of course Renée didn't literally wail from begining to end lah. There were a few quiet moments in between when she cried herself to sleep. And I grabbed that opportunity to shop =)

I think I spent close to RM500 that day.

A thermos flask.

A white tote bag.

A pair of black & white wedges.

And now....I NEED a new purse.

And I'm thinking if I should get back another Kipling or go for a new brand.

..
.

These are the two that I kindda like and am thinking of getting but it looks like what I have now. Although the one I'm currently using is lime green but is already all dirty and yucks!

But seeing that the price of Kipling purses is pretty much the same as GUESS? purses, I'm thinking maybe I should get a GUESS? one instead.

Thinking.....thinking....

Am heading to Mid Valley tomorrow for lunch with the girls so will go check out the GUESS? and Kipling outlets and look at their selection of purses.

I'm soooo like renewing all my stuff now. New purse, new bag, more new shoes and I so need to update my wardrobe! All the clothes I have in there are all so a year ago and most of them I can't wear anymore cos they're slutty and I can't be slutty anymore =(

I'm a mother now.

Have to carry myself with a bit more class. Less exposed skin. Less skin tight clothes.

Sigh.....

Besides, no point wearing really nice sexy tops anymore anyways cause Renée recently realised that she has saliva and has been blowing bubbles and dribbling non-stop.....onto my baju! And sometimes, she decides to blow milk bubbles with the milk she regurgitates.

It's ironic really

2008-09-04T22:39:00.004+08:00

...that I left a 5 days week, 9am - 6pm, fully paid, high flying management job for a 24 hours 7 days week job as a stay home mom with NO pay.

...that I'm no longer reporting to the General Manager of the company I used to work for but am now at the beck and call of a little 2 weeks old, bawling and pooping miniature of FattyHubby.

taken BEFORE i delivered

...and the question is

AM I HAPPY?

*thinks*

Well, I guess I am.

just out from my tummy

Don't get me wrong if I don't sound as enthusiastic as a new mother should be. It is after all a totally different lifestyle as to what I used to live before. A year ago, I was still club hopping and chugging down jugs of beers. It never even crossed my mind that I would have a daughter so soon.

Renée's info

And now that I'm stuck at home with only a wailing baby to look at, two heavily engorged breasts, having to put the wailing baby to feed every hour - day AND night, the lack of sleep, the still slightly potruding tummy, and a disaster of a hairstyle....

...well, let's just say that my life isn't the same as before and will never be again.

1 day old

I look back at pictures of my partying days, which by the way, was NOT so long ago....and sigh...

I look back at pictures of myself in a bikini taken in Koh Samui....and sigh...

I look back at my gorgeous long hair which I was sporting just 9 months ago...and sigh...

...but then, when my eyes set upon my daughter, that slight smile sitting on her sleepy face....I know everything was worth giving up for.

After all, I can always go partying again when Renée's slightly older, and I would definitely be able to get back into shape again with a little bit of exercise, and hair will grow in time....but nothing can ever replace the precious moment when I first set eyes on my daughter, and know that she is MINE.

my sweetheart

Although, I had one drama pregnancy....but I shall blog about that another time.

It's for the best...I guess

2008-08-11T18:18:00.003+08:00

Went for my 36th week check-up yesterday and baby's still breeched.

Doc checked the space and waters surrounding her and said there isn't much left to help her engage. But she gave me one week.

If baby has not turned by the time I go for my 37th week check-up, then she will have to schedule me in for a c-section.

I.DO.NOT.WANT.TO.BE.CUT.OPEN!!!!

I never even prepared myself mentally to go through a c-section.

I've always told myself that I will have a natural delivery and that there was no need for me to be sliced open.

But I guess the baby made the decision for me.

It's either because she knows I have a narrow uterus and she won't be able to make the journey through.

Or she's just too comfortable to turn.

Sigh...

I'm afraid of the healing process.

I hate the fact that FattyHubby won't be able to come into the OT with me.

I can't believe that FattyHubby and I cannot experience the birth of our first child together.

I feel that I've let FattyHubby down by not being able to have a natural birth.

Sigh....

But then again, as long as the baby comes out from this whole thing safely, who am I to complain.

Sometimes. Life sucks. Like that.

Shoopeedooo!!!

2008-07-25T17:16:00.002+08:00

Splurged on myself one last time (konon-lah) before the baby comes! And am happy happy happy!

Had a hard time deciding between the blue and the pink but when I saw the green, I just fell in love. So unique! And it matches my green Kipling purse too!

It's touch screen and comes with a really cute stylus but I prefer using my fingernails. Still learning how to use it but since my last camera was also a Sony Cybershot, there shouldn't be much diffrence except for a few new features.

So, hopefully with this new toy, my blog would be brightened up with more colourful chirpy pictures!

Freaking Out

2008-07-21T18:55:00.003+08:00

Something happened last night that got me thinking.

Real hard.

And it sucks.

Cos when I start thinking about things like that, I get extremely paranoid.

I'm not what you would call the most fortunate person on earth.

Anything bad that happens to someone, there's a high percentage that it will happen to me as well.

I'm not cursing myself.

I'm just saying that I'm always careful and never take things for granted.

And I'm prone to mishaps befalling me.

And I never know if it will happen to me.

But things that get me thinking, gets me extra worried.

And when I'm worried, I start freaking out.

What happened?

I know this person.

And her baby's due date is this week.

She lost her baby last week.

So tell me.

How can I NOT freak out?

I want this

2008-07-17T16:54:00.001+08:00

AN ELECTRONIC BUG SWATTER THINGY

So that I can start whacking at all the stupid mosquitoes that somehow managed to escape into my tightly enclosed room and suck my blood.

It's so annoying really, to be nodding off to sleep and then suddenly, you hear that stupid buzzing sound that only mosquitoes make, flying around your ears. And no matter how much you swing your hands around your ears, the damn thing keeps coming back!

And then, you end up whacking your own ears and face in the process.

At least with this swatter thing, I don't have to get up and start clapping my hands at every damn place that I think I saw the mossie flying pass. I can just pick the swatter up and play air tennis. I'm SURE I'd hit the mossie somehow. And then it will die a torturous death of being burnt and eletrocuted alive.

I can even use the swatter on cockroaches, especially tiny ones that lurks at corners and runs damn fast. And like what XiaXue wrote, it can also be used on adult cockraoches. At least if it doesn't kill them, it'll burn their feelers and leave them directionless and they'll be running around in circles and I can then smash them with a slipper / book / whatever.

Best of all, it can be used on lizards too!!!! (Claps hand in glee!).

Baby lizards can be bbq-ed alive and if they try to escape by releasing their disgusting small tiny tails, it'll be burnt up too! Ha! Imagine the joy of killing lizards. I'll never have to run in the other direction anymore.

As for adult lizards, I don't know if it will work on them or not. But at least it will leave them shocked and paralyzed for a while. And while they are recovering from the shock, I can swat them over and over and over again until they eventually die a slow and painful burning death. I seriously think I will enjoy myself squatting next to it and just smacking it repeatedly and watching it slip into eternal death.

Hmph! That's for trying to scare me by running out from behind bathroom doors. And for appearing out of nowhere while I'm looking through my junk. And for making that annoying, irritating sound that they make ALL the time!!!!

Someone once told me that lizards are actually guardians and it guards us from ghosts and spirits around us by making that stupid sound and that we should appreciate lizards.

Well, he can go kiss the lizard all he wants, and if a ghost or spirit comes near me, I'll whack it with the electronic zapper too!

4D ULTRASOUND SCAN

I KNOW it's a waste of money, especially when I'm already this close to popping BUT I still want one!!!

I KNOW it's gonna cost me (okay, fine, FattyHubby) double the amount of a normal 2D scan but c'mon! It's our first baby, and I want to see if the doc is right and if she really looks like FattyHubby instead of me!

Actually, when I was at week 28, I already asked the doc if we could do a 4D scan, but Renee had her hand covering half her face and was only peeping out from the corner of her hand, so it wasn't worthit to get the 4D.

Then at week 30, she had her other hand covering the other half of her face so again, cannot do 4D.

At week 32, totally couldn't see her face. She had her buttocks facing us instead....

Damn drama princess!

So I told myself, tried 3 times and 3 times also fail. Which means it's fated lah that we don't waste the money on the 4D scan. But I also KNOW for sure now that we've decided not to waste the money, when I see the doc again next week, she'll be facing the camera fully with a wide smile spread accross her face.

And when that happens, should we get the scan done or not?

I'll be at week 34 by then...and only have about another 4 to 6 weeks to go before she pops and I can see her for real. So should we even spend that extra money to do it. Or just wait. I know we should wait...

but...

little fingers and little toes, littles eyes and little nose, funny facial expressions and cute body reactions....and all without having to wait 4 to 6 more weeks. *BIG SIGH*

NEW HAIR COLOUR

I'm soooooo sick of my own dark brown hair already! This is the longest I've gone without dying my hair and I am already running out of patience. The only reason why I still have not gone and done it is because Fred@LeVie REFUSES to colour my hair for me until AFTER I give birth.

I even offered to pay him more than his usual charges, but he's stubborn. Won't even budge. Won't even take out the colour chart for me to at least just look at the colours. Of course, I can easily walk into another salon to get it done, but then again, I don't trust anyone else with my hair except for Fred@LeVie and so, that's why my hair is still what it is. B-O-R-I-N-G!!!

I sms-ed him this morning, telling him to promise me that he will dye my hair for me with any colour I want cause I've been so obedient all these while.

I've got my sights set on either BLUE

PURPLE.

I've decided not to go for red cause I've done that before a looooong time ago. I've also decided not to go for blonde cause I'm not as tanned as before anymore. That's why this time, I'm going for darker colours. But at least they're still not boring.

And besides, I want to try something new. But not too shocking as well.

******

Read this article and it got me thinking.

Why keep arresting Anwar?

If you're so serious about this issue and it's of such offence, why not arrest Saiful as well? After all, it takes two to tango.

Unless Anwar had the poor boy strapped down to the chair.

Such contradictions.

And you call yourselves our political leaders.

I think political court-jesters suits you more.

Cause you guys really seriously make me laugh!

It's always like that...hmph!

2008-07-10T15:06:00.004+08:00

Fine. I admit. I've ran out of things to blog about. Plus. I've become extremely lazy. And there's nothing that attracts me more now. Other than the BED. In the cold air-conditioned room.

So there. My excuse for the lack of blogs lately.

But then again. This is MY blogsite. And it's up to me when I want to post something.

PLUS...

I'm pregnant. Like 8 months. And. I. AIN'T. NOT. LIKING. IT.

C'mon. It's so unfair!

I don't understand why it's women that have to suffer from period cramps every month and the men don't have to go through anything. And why it's women that have to go through pregnancy's horrible symptoms (like yours truly here) and the men don't have to. And why is it that even through pregnancy, it's women that have to suffer from backaches, pelvic aches, stretch marks, frequent urination - DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I HAVE TO GO PEE IN AN HOUR??? IT'S NOT ONLY TIRING WALKING AROUND WITH A ONE TONNE BOWLING BALL IN YOUR TUMMY, BUT HAVING TO WALK TO THE TOILET LIKE A FREAKING MILLION TIMES IN ONE HOUR WITH THE BOWLING BALL STUCK TO YOUR TUMMY AND HAVING STREAKS OF PAIN SLICE THROUGH YOUR LOWER BACK AND PELVIC IS NOT FUN LORR!!! - and having to go through the pain of labour when the men don't need to go through any single thing at all? And why is it that after the baby is born, it's the women that have to suffer from sleepless nights and cracked nipples and engorged breasts when nothing happens to the men?

So unfair!

I WISH the men would suffer at least a little bit with their women so that they can learn to appreciate their women a little more.

Sighs.....

But you know what I think?

I think the reason why I'm in such a foul mood now even with the weekend so close is BECAUSE the weekend is close.

And I especially detest THIS weekend because, as most of you would know by now and if you don't, you're more clueless than I am, it's the RAINFOREST FESTIVAL weekend in Kuching!!!!

AAAARRRGGGGGHHH!!!!!

And I'm missing it. Again.

Already bad enough that I missed last year's cause I was so busy preparing for the wedding. And I promised myself to make it for this year's one. But no. I decided to get pregnant instead. Of all things. I decided to subject myself to the woes of pregnancy.

So while the whole world is partying away to the sounds of rainforest festival, I'll be partying to the sounds of FattyHubby's snores and little unborn Renee's kicks and hiccups.

Digress a bit yah.

Talking about hiccups, Renee has been hiccup-ing a lot lately. Like close to 3 times a day. And I don't know if that's normal. Could it be because I've been drinking so much Coke that the gas are all going to her that's causing her to hiccup uncontrollably?

So please, mothers out there, if you know why....do share.

Okay. Undigress.

Since we're on the subject of babies, let's talk about 3rd party inteference.

LEAVE US ALONE TO LOOK AFTER THE BABY OUR WAY!!!!

How are we ever going to gain experience by ourselves if you keep harping on the 'right' way to look after a baby??? What IS the 'right' way anyways? Just because it worked for you does not mean it will work for us. So, how is that the 'right' way?

And when you say 'right' way, you are referring to when you had a child which was AGES ago. Things have changed now. Technology have advanced. We don't do things the way you used to anymore.

Let's take for example. You say that a baby should not be put in an infant car seat when he/she is only a few days old. You say that the baby should be carried in the mother's arms while traveling.

But I say no. I say that it's safer for the baby to be placed in an infant car seat whenever we travel than to be carried in the mother's arms. Doctors say so. Books write so. The amount of horror stories I hear about what happens to babies who are carried in the mother's arms instead of placed in car seats while traveling is enough to tell me what is right and what is wrong.

So. What IS the 'right' way?

During your era got infant car seats meh? Of course don't have lah. So of course you say carry the baby is safer lah.

But think for a while can. Why did they even invent infant car seats IF carrying the baby is much safer? Invent for what then? To simply waste money issit? People so free meh nowadays?

Obviously a lot of R&D were put behind the invention of car seats and it was concluded that car seats are a safer mode of tavelling for babies lah.

So the same goes for your napkins vs diapers.

Old method of sterilizing bottles vs bottle sterilizers.

Sleeping on bed with mother vs sleeping in cot.

Baby cots vs playpens.

Sarongs vs nightgowns.

Bottle feeding vs breast feeding.

You vs Me.

So. Please. I appreciate all your advices. And you are free to give them to me. But DON'T and NEVER EXPECT me to listen to them if I feel that I can handle things MY own way.

That's all I ask.

Stop interfering.

It gets weirder

2008-06-26T12:16:00.002+08:00

It crawled slowly across the bed.

It was HUGE and black....all 6 legs skinny and shaking as it tried to balance itself while crawling across the soft quilt.

I looked at it through half open eyes and slowly picked up the bolster lying on the floor beside me.

Just a light swipe, I told myself, and that will send it flying off the bed and I can go back to sleep.

SWIPE!!!

SPLAT!!!

SHLEEEEEPPpppppp........

It was amazing how many things spilled out from that tiny little bug.

Green stuff oozed out....mixed with intestines and blood and even a dead frog.

The stench immediately hit my nose and it knocked me back.

I threw the bolster aside....it was stained with greeen eeky stuff and blood.

And quickly pulled out the tissue box.

But the more I tried wiping...the more intestines spilled out and the smellier it got.

The puddle of mess got bigger and bigger and soon, the dead frog burst open and more intestines came spewing out, exploding all around me, splattering onto the walls and onto my clothes.

I gagged.

And gagged.

The stench surrounded me and I couldn't move, stuck in bed, as the pool of blood and intestines covered me....

I opened my mouth to scream.....
And more intestines and green goo came pouring out

And then...

I woke.

And blinked as the familiar bedroom flooded my vision.

I turned and looked at FattyHubby, silently sleeping beside me.

And there was no bug.

******

I've been having really weird dreams of late. Like last night, I dreamed that my monthly menses came. But consciously, I knew I was pregnant and that I shouldn't be getting it. So I was caught between sleep and consciousness, confused and worried about getting my period and at the same time, telling myself that it cannot be because I AM pregnant.

And then the night before that, I dreamed that I was about to marry the WRONG MAN! I was all decked out in my wedding gown, holding my favorite flowers, looking like the most beautiful bride there possibly is, and as I walked down the aisle, I looked up and the wrong groom was looking back at me. No no no....this cannot be! I'm suppose to be marrying my Fatty....not this strange person staring back at me.

I started to panic and looked around. Maybe this was a prank. Maybe Fatty was hiding somewhere, ready to jump out and surprise me. But he was no where to be seen. My heart started pumping harder and harder...and I swear it would have pumped right out of my chest.

I tried to stop the wedding, tried to turn around and run, but my feet woudn't listen to me. They continued to bring me forward and then, before I knew it, the strange man who was my groom, took my hand in his and smiled down at me.

Argh! Get your hands off me you bastard! I tried to shout. But nothing came out.

Everyone around me were cheering and clapping but I didn't know a single familar face.

The faces all around me were distorted and ugly and I needed to get away.

The groom started turning my face to his...and his lips came closer and closer to mine. I tried to turn my face away, but it was held tight by him....and as he slowly came closer and closer....I started to faint.

And then, I woke up.

And turned to see if FattyHubby was next to me. And he was!

I hugged him and kissed him and curled up closer to him, holding his hands.

And I didn't let it go until I fell asleep.

But the bug dream, by far, has GOT to be one of the weirdest dream I ever had. And I have no idea why. And I hate it.

It's already bad enough that I don't really get enough sleep at nights.

Either it's too hot.

Or it's numerous trips to the toilet.

Or the baby is kicking me too hard.

And now, I have to deal with weird choking dreams too.

Sighs....

Anyways......

Onto other topics that cheers me up.....

I went shopping with BestieKat 2 Fridays ago, and she gave me one of the best crash courses on how to buy baby's necessities in that 5 hours we were in One U.

We shopped for things I NEVER KNEW EXISTED!

I mean, baby nail-clippers that comes attached with its own magnifying glass??? Who would have thought of that!

I ended up spending RM640 ONLY on baby's stuff.

And then last weekend, FattyHubby and I went scouting for strollers. It took us about 5 days before we found THE ONE.

And it's in Pink AND Black too!

Love it to pieces and FattyHubby likes the feel of it (since he'll be the one pushing it most of the time).

If only it was made for me....hahaha!

Oooh....Mega Sale starting next Sat!

Can't wait!

Playpens.....here I come!

Baby Shower

2008-06-21T14:15:00.002+08:00

Here are some pictures from the baby shower organised by BlossomMich and ButtercupTjin.

Sorry, don't really have the time to blog so for now, can only post up pictures.

But thank you to everyone who came, for all the pressies and angpows.

Thank you, FattyHubby, for all your help with this as well....I know you put in a lot of effort and I love you for that.

BlossomMich and ButtercupTjin, you know I appreciate everything you girls did and I love you both.

Muaks muaks hugs hugs!

.
.
.
.

What else can happen?

2008-06-11T00:04:00.003+08:00

Monday

I drove to work today because FattyHubby had an appointment after work and couldn't send me home first. But it's okay, I can still drive. After all, my tummy still hasn't touched the steering yet and my car is ONLY a manual....not that hard to drive.

So, I nicely steered into the office basement and found the perfect spot near the elevators and did my best to reverse in without the guide from my reverse sensors. Did I not mention that my dumb dog bit off the wires from my reverse sensors and left two gapping holes where the sensors used to be, with 2 wires hanging gaily at the back of my car? No? Well, that's what she did and now, I'm driving around with two gapping holes and wires sticking out from the butt of my otherwise, beautiful, sleek black car.

Am still waiting for FattyHubby to get it done for me....

Anyways, so I successfully parked and got out of the car, with a bit of trouble as the car next to me was parked a little out of his line. But I managed to get out.

And then I saw how near my car and the other car was. Mind you, mine was parked right in the centre of the box. His was a little over to my side. And there was only about 2 inches space between our side mirrors.

But instead of doing the smart thing by getting back into my car and parking it somewhere else, I decided that I could get pass the 2 inches space by SUCKING IT IN.

Grabbing my bag tighter, I ambitiously walked between the mirrors...

AND GOT STUCK!!!!!

I totally forgot that not only were the mirrors the same height as my stomach, I also conveniently forgot that I was 7 months pregnants and no matter how much I tried sucking it in, there wasn't much that got sucked in.

So there I was, stuck.

Couldn't move left, couldn't move right.

I huffed and puffed and tried to suck in as much as I could. But I was still stuck.

Stupid femme. Stupid femme. Stupid femme.

A woman walked pass and looked at me and I flashed her the biggest smile I could. Don't worry about me, I'm just stuck but I'm loving it.

She disappeared into the building and I stopped grinning like an idiot. An idiot that was stuck between 2 side mirrors of 2 different cars.

I tried folding back my side mirror but it wouldn't budge.

In the end, I bent my knees and squatted down slightly so that both mirrors went up pass my belly and to my chest and I managed to squat walk sideways out.

I should have thought of that earlier.

Tuesday

Getting stuck between 2 side mirrors and hurting my tummy a little was not enough drama for me, you know.

Today, I decided to totter into the office wearing heels.

Why?

Because I'm not driving mah. FattyHubby driving me mah. So I can wear heels lorr.

And then, halfway through the day, I decided that I want to go to Digital Mall after work to get my speakers and totally forgot about the fact that I was on heels and shouldn't be walking around too much.

So after work, we went to Digital Mall and of course, FattyHubby insisted on dropping me off at the entrance first while he went to look for parking.

But hero here decided to follow her hubby and didn't want to go into the mall alone first. After going around like 5 times, we finally found parking in front of Pizza Hut.

And I tottered clumsily over the unbalanced tar road.

The whole time, FattyHubby kept asking me if my feet were ok and I kept insisting they were even though they were hurting like hell. Just to avoid getting nagged at for wearing heels.

By the time we got home, my feet were hurting so bad, I could only limp into the room, fall into bed and massage my feet.

So much for wearing heels because I wasn't driving.

Later after dinner, when my feet were feeling much better (that's cos FattyHubby found out the truth cos he barged into the room while I was massaging my feet and even though I hid my feet under the blankets like superquick, he caught me, and gave me an hour long nag but also an hour long feet massage), I excitedly skipped up the stairs and dragged my new speakers into the room to test them.

I got everything in place, plugged the red wire into the red socket, the white wire into the white sockets and then took the sound jack and plugged it into my MP3 player.

No sound.

Eh, cannot be mah.

I checked everything, made sure I had everything plugged in and that the switch was on, and all looked fine to me. So I tried again.

Still no sound.

I pulled out the sound jack and checked it against my earphones jack. Both same size, same length, so shouldn't be a problem kan.

But why still no sound?

So I tried it on my laptop and the sound came out perfectly well.

So why does it not work with my MP3?

I called for FattyHubby to help me.

He took one look at my MP3 and gave me THE look.

Did you turn on the volume on your MP3?

I looked at the MP3. The volume level was off.

DAMN!

My 28th Birthday - whoopeee....

2008-06-09T23:32:00.003+08:00

My birthday just came and went *snaps finger* just like that. And now, it's over and I'm officially 2 years away from hitting the big THREE ZERO.

Life.Is.So.Damn.Unfair.

I mean, let's rewind back to two years ago.

My birthday was a whirlwind of partying, boozing and puking into big pots - where I ended up being carried back by 3 men - FattyHubby, Patrick and my dad >_<

Yes, MY dad...

More than 30 friends and family members celebrated the event with me and we had a blast of a time! What with freeflow of whisky and DJ spinning retro music and all.

Then, one year back.

My group of closest friends threw me a surprise birthday party and we had a good dinner, a great time catching up and also, non-stop booze.

Then this year.

It was so bleak I thought it was a funeral instead of a birthday.

Yes, so I'm married.

And yes, so I'm about 7 months pregnant.

But that doesn't mean I still can't have fun right.

WRONG!

I can't!

Not because my husband is boring....trust me, he definitely isn't.

Not because my friends are not happening anymore....they still are.

BUT it's because I get tired soooo easily!

Which really sucks, you know.

FattyHubby took the day off last Friday to spend my birthday with me since I was on leave as well. He had the whole day planned out for us.

Lunch, followed by a whole afternoon of shopping, and then ending the day by bringing me up to Genting for my favourite Durian Tempura.

Oh, we started off the day according to plan....
We went to Bonton for a nice, cozy lunch.....had the most delicious pie-tee in the world, a huge bowl of Sarawak Laksa, yummy pulut 'tong-sui' for dessert and a slice of absolutely lip-smacking blueberry cheesecake compliments from the chef.

And then when the husband wanted to bring me shopping, instead of jumping at the opportunity (after all, how often does a husband offer to take a wife shopping), I decided to get tired and sleepy and insisted on going home so that I can nap. DUH!

And napped I did!

From 3pm all the way to 8pm...so dinner in Genting for my favourite Durian Tempura was out the window as well.

And it wasn't because FattyHubby didn't try waking me up, he did. I just refused to.

So, we ended up in Pyramid at 9.15pm for a quick Korean dinner.

See......

All because I was tired!!!

And I get tired ALL THE TIME!!!

After work, I'm sleeping till 9pm before I wake up for dinner.

And then, I'm alseep again.

On weekends, I'm awake at 12pm...and then by 3pm, I have to sleep again.

And tiredness just hits me when I least expect it.

It just comes, slaps me in the head, and my eyes are closing....be it whether I'm driving, or sitting on the toilet bowl, or eating....whatever.

SO, that was how I spent my birthday.

SLEEPING!

Happy Birthday to me!

belly

2008-05-27T17:26:00.001+08:00

Ok, here's a picture of me at 6 and a half months preggers!
Enjoy!
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More like got no time to blog...

lup you long time

2008-05-09T15:18:00.003+08:00

HaPPy BIrTHdaY, MISHY MASHY!!!

you're still favourably known as BlossomMich. PuffPuff rules!

Remember how we met so many many years ago.

It was like as if fate threw us together and I've never had a better friend than I have in you (and ButtercupTjin as well, but this is not about her. She'll have her turn).

We've been through so much ups and downs, laughter and tears, accidents (mine mostly) and in and outs of a million different relationships, and yet, here we are, still strong for each another and the best-est of friends *grins*

Remember the time we went to Pyramid during one of the days we skipped class and I gostan-ed into the green pillar at the parking lot?

Hahahahahaha!

And how I was always late in picking you up for classes and you always get mighty pissed at me but you allowed me to pick you up the day after anyways?

Which also explained why we missed half of the lectures throughout our college years....hahaha!

And the time when we were bawling our eyes out when you and ButtercupTjin flew off to Perth and I had to stay behind...*sniffles*....

I still keep the postcards you girls wrote to me from the plane.

And the best of all was the times when we went for drinks to curse and condemn all the men that came and went in our lives.....

And I ENDED up marrying one of them anyways....

I can never imagine how life would be without you, the always practical, sensible one that will talk me out of all my drama moments.

If it wasn't because you knocked some sense in me, I might not even have gotten married....hahaha!

So, here's to you, sweetheart!!!

BFFs forever.....*bimbo accent*....

Love you!!!

Labour's Day

2008-05-03T23:36:00.003+08:00

Went to watch IronMan on Thursday - Labour's Day at Signature @ The Gardens. It was the second time we were wathcing a movie there.

The first time we went, we couldn't find the cinema and we made it JUST in time for the movie. What was it again....oh...yah....The Golden Compass.

This time, since it was a holiday, we bought the 5.30pm show and I made FattyHubby bring me there earlier so I could walk around The Gardens for a bit.

Can you imagine, since it opened, I have not been there at all, never checked out the place. Damn swakoo okay.

This time, we had enough time to grab a quick bite before the movie started. Oh wow!

We went to this restaurant, The Gurney Drive. I was tempted when I saw the Penang Chee Cheong Fun and FattyHubby was tempted by the Happy Hours rates.

Manatahu when we sat down, we were informed Happy Hours rate NOT applicable on public holidays.

I got to eat my chee cheong fun though!

Not as good as the authentic Penang chee cheong fun from Penang lah...duh....but yummy enough for me to want to go back for more.

We also ordered the Rojak Buah cause I got greedy. But couldn't finish.

Overall, nice ambience lah...price so-so....
Would only go back there if I happen to be in Mid Valley.

Definitely will not purposely go all the way there just because I feel like eating chee cheong fun lah.

IRONMAN WAS SUPERB!!!!

I loved it soooooo much that FattyHubby and I are watching it again.

When I first found out that Robert Downey Jr. was playing the role of the hero, I was a little sceptical. I mean, the last time I saw him, it was in Only You and Heaven & Soul (I think) so I remembered him as the scrawny little man from those romantic movies.

But when I saw him in IronMan, my jaw dropped open!!!

O.M.G!!!!

He BUFFED up!!!!

And somehow got more rugged in the process.
And is soooooooo COOL!

And yet, still makes me laugh.

Now where the hell in Malaysia can we find a man like that, huh?

My 7th month old nephew, Devon, came back from Singapore for a visit over the Labour Day weekend.

See how much he's grown!!!

And soooooo adorable too!!!!

Must look at more cute babies so my little imp can be as adorable!

Smokey Pubs and DreamGirls

2008-04-30T11:41:00.006+08:00

Is it just me or is the weather really hot these pass few days? I mean, it's like I hop in for a quick shower, and by the time I hop out, I feel like hopping in again.

I can just imagine what I would feel if I had not chopped off all my hair. MAJOR mood swings! ButtercupTjin, I so feel like being with you in Manchester right now....*sighs*....

On another pregnancy note, I'm getting a little worried about my weight. My gynea said that a pregnant woman should put on an average of 10 - 15kgs from start to end of pregnancy. I'm now 5 and a half months and I don't seem to be putting on much weight.

Pre-pregnancy saw me at 45kgs.

Now, I'm only standing at 50kgs.

And the weird thing, I've been standing at 50kgs for the pass 2 months.

Weird right?

Especially when I've been eating soooooo much!

And not just anything, I've been stuffing myself with rice and noodles and fried stuff and whatever unhealthy fattening stuff you can think of, I'm eating.

Of course it's not like as if I'm purposely consuming unhealthy food lah. I'm saying that I have not been staying away from anything in particular, I eat whatever that comes along. So I'm really shocked why I'm still only 50kgs.

But the baby's been doing fine. She kicks me very actively so I don't think there's anything to be worried about her. I'm just worried about myself. Either I'm not seriously eating enough or the baby's been eating all my food and she has been putting on weight while I lost mine.

******

Decided that since I have not really been out for anything 'happening' since I got preggers, I decided to follow FattyHubby for KaraokeQueenHelen's birthday @ Bilique in Bangsar on Monday night.

I've never been to Bilique so I didn't know it was a closed up pub-cum-karaoke kindda place. I thought maybe if it was like one of those pubs that have an inside and outside area, and it gets too smokey for me, I could always take a quick nip out, take a breather and go back in.

ButtercupTjin always has weird poses

I almost died dot com (like how Cheesie would have said it)!

me and AnnUma

No, seriously, it was good to be able to meet up with so many people I have not seen in such a long time (so much so that I was hugging people that I couldn't even remember their names) but I really really almost killed myself.

Ok lah, not so drama that I will kill myself lah, but it was serious enough to put my baby at risk. Cause when we left Bilique, and I walked out, FattyHubby could actually hear my congested lungs while I breathe.

That was how smokey the place was and that was how much smoke I actually inhaled into my lungs....SECOND HAND TOO!!!!

Thank goodness for me, my lungs cleared up in 15 minutes and I had to keep forcing myself to cough it all out. So much lah for pregnant woman wanting to be happening.

Fail lah.

******

I was invited for the Malaysian DreamGirls Finale on tuesday evening @ the Oval, One U and decided to drag FattyHubby to go with me.

Honestly, I've never seen a single episode of the online reality show since it started, but since I got invited and I couldn't go to any other happening events in pubs, this was the next best thing to being happening.

I've become pathetic >_<'

Of course, I bumped into a few fellow bloggers and some celebrities there so it didn't make it seem all that sad lah.

The KinkyBlueFairy was there with HitzRudy and KennySia was one of the judges for the talent search. ElaineDaly was hosting the event so there was quite a huge crowd gathered around outside the barricaded areas.

From the begining of the event till the end, everyone was cheering for Hanis. And it was obvious. When ElaineDaly introduced Adeline, no cheers. When she introduced Cindy, no cheers. But before she could even call out Hanis' name, the crowd went wild!!!!

ChatterboxJane

"Confirm Hanis going to win la. No need to stay until end to find out also"

"Ya lorr....obvious lah"

But to everybody's shock and dismay (except for Cindy's family of course), not only did Hanis NOT win the title, but she only won 3rd place. 3rd PLACE! Imagine that.

Adeline got the 2nd place and Cindy took the title home.

sorry lah...a bit blur. didn't carry my canggih camera with me

Now everyone's calling the show Malaysian DreamBitch.

KJ and Donnie

I guess maybe in the modeling industry, it's easier to work with a non-Muslim cause they're more open to being dressed in more revealing and daring clothes.

But whether she won or not, I'm very sure she'd get signed up for a few contracts so Hanis, this is not the end of the world for you.
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hey! we're suppose to be in 'this' together! i can't drink, you can't too!

spunk or dunk?

2008-04-28T13:32:00.002+08:00

I dunno whether being pregnant makes you do crazy things but it sure is making me do things that I never for the world of me would think of doing...

I chopped off my hair and gave it the Halle Berry look.

YES, I DID!!!

It's short short short.....so short!!! And the worse part, my stylist taught me how to style it and when he did it for me, it looked pretty damn good, but when I tried it on my own back home, I couldn't do it. I just couldn't.

So much for Halle Berry.

Look more like Halle Hairy now....*sighs*....

But I do like it lah. Just need to learn how to style it properly.

Next up....hair colour!!!

Vanilla spice

2008-04-10T16:53:00.003+08:00

I happily trotted out of the house this morning with a huge bottle of yogurt in one hand and a 1.5l bottle of vanilla coke in the other.

FattyHubby: You going camping issit?

Me: Aren't you glad that your wife knows how to look after herself *i was in a happy mood*

FH: What look after yourself?

Me: I'm taking in my proper nutrients lah. See...(happily points to yogurt)...taking my yogurt drink and see....(happily points to vanilla coke)....vanilla coke which contains vanilla which is a form of milk which is MORE calcium!

I happily smirked at him feeling absolutely proud of myself.

FattyHubby turns to me with an unexplainable look on his face...

"Am I talking to a moron or what? Vanilla is NOT milk lah!"

And he was right.

I googled it the minute I got into office.

Vanilla is a SPICE.

I was a stupid kid.

>_<'

On another note.....

I felt my baby's kick for the FIRST TIME EVER TODAY!!!

It's not like 'fluttering of butterflies' as is written in all pregnancy books.

It's more like soft kicks *thud*thud*thud*

And it's been going on since 3.30pm today and I can still feel her thud-ding away right now.

Thank goodness she's no kickboxer - yet.

new gadgets, pink and shakin' asses

2008-04-08T16:05:00.002+08:00

So, I decided to spend my hard earned money on a 40GB mp3 player.

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My excuse - so that my baby can listen to soothing music while she's sleeping in my tummy.
Although of course, as proven on Discovery Science, babies nestling inside the mother's womb cannot hear anything outside the womb except for a slight echo of the mother's voice.

Well, then I can still listen to the songs and sing to her =)
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Reality - I've always wanted to get an mp3 player for no reason at all. Just wanted one.

FattyHubby gave me an earful when I showed my new toy to him. Not because he's stingy with MY money but because I promised him a week before that I won't buy anything expensive for myself anymore.

>_<

But hey, I bought you a BIG bottle of perfume! So forgiven lah...

Kit, I think you better call him personally and tell him not to bully me lah. I showed him your message and he just laughed...hmph!

Everyone's been asking me if I look really fat now. I don't think so. I mean, I can still wear my own tops, just had to switch my button-up pants for drawstring ones now.

"Then you must look like a fishball stuck to a chopstick!"

Idiot.

BlossomMich and ButtercupTjin are throwing me an all ALL PINK baby shower sometime in June and I'm so excited! My very first baby shower! And I'm inviting my guy friends and relatives. Break tradition a bit lah.

I can just imagine. Pink and white balloons. Pink paper serviettes. Pink paper plates and paper cups. Pink roses. Pink dresses. Pink pink pink!

FattyHubby will be soooo annoyed. Hahahaha! *evil grins*

He told me no way will our daughter be swath in anything pink. She will only wear macho macho colours.

*rolls eyes*

Am listening to my mp3 player now.

KJ asked: "So what soothing song you listening to now?"

Me: "Snoop Dogg and Eminem's Shake That Ass For Me"

KJ: -_-'

...

2008-04-07T16:25:00.002+08:00

It's like I suddenly got nothing to write about cos I'm pregnant.

I thought lah maybe with pregnancy I would have more things to talk about but nothing seems to come to mind whenever I come into my blog.

FemmeFatale not so 'Femme' anymore lah...now can call FattyFatale dy.

My daughter (yes, I'm gonna have a baby girl!) damn drama wei! She's made me and FattyHubby go through a heart attack session at least once a month for the pass 5 months and it's not easy yah. All these emotional traumas.

I seriously have to think twice about going through this all over again if we plan for number two. But let me get through this first and see if I survive motherhood.

Super LOW rates!

2008-03-12T11:56:00.003+08:00

Advertorial
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Naturally, since I work for them, it was a matter of time before I was actually asked to blog about them too. Of course, I'm still doing this from a neutral point of view and am not gonna be like totally biased because, honestly, I've never even spent the night at the hotel before.
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I've been there for like a thousand times, of course, for events, interviews, media tours, etc., and I have used one of the rooms for a day during one of the launches we had, so I do have an idea on what to expect when staying there.
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the new rooms

Tune Hotels.Com will be celebrating their 1st Anniversary in April and is now throwing away room prices starting from as low as RM0.01 for the hotel in 1Borneo, Kota Kinabalu and RM10.00 for the hotel in Downtown KL. These rates are for online bookings only.
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I know some of you might be thinking, aiyah, budget hotel, nobody wanna stay, sure they throw prices for so low lah, but you'll be surprised to know that since the hotel was launched in April last year, it has been getting an average occupancy rate of 95% every single day.
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The rooms used to be very simple with polished cement floors and loud coloured walls but after getting feedback from guests, the management decided to upgrade the rooms and make it brighter. After all, they do have to go in flow with their motto of having 5-star service at a 1-star price.
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the old rooms

The rooms are pretty neat. Each room comes with a Double/Single KingKoil Bed with a 250-thread count duvet, En-suite bathrooms with PowerShowers (definitely with water heater as well) AND toilet paper. The air-conditioning is an add-on facility, going for RM5.00 for 5 hours and RM10.00 for 12 hours. This is an option for those who do not need air-conditioning in their rooms and also to encourage the society these days NOT to waste electricity. Erm...and yeah, toiletries and towels are NOT provided as well.
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So bring your own shampoo and soap! If you need towels, they sell it lah, downstairs at the 7-Eleven.
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Overall, if you're not the Paris Hilton type and not fussy about certain things, Tune Hotels.Com is a good and cheaper choice of accomodation.
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So if I were you, and with the airfares to KK so cheap now, I would go online and book myself into the NEW Tune Hotels.Com 1Borneo KK. Who knows, if I book my air tickets and rooms now for a stay in May, I might just get to enjoy sight seeing in Kota Kinabalu for only less than RM100!
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So book now to enjoy the RM0.01 room rates at KK for stay dates from Apr 15 - July 31 or RM10.00 room rates in KL for stay dates from Mar 23 - Jul 31. You can also log onto www.tunehotels.com or call 03 - 7962 5888 for more information!

At Three Months

2008-03-03T16:43:00.002+08:00

I'm officially pregnant!

I never knew there was a day I could finally announce this here after all I went through the pass 2 months, but I made it! And so did the baby! And if we could survive through what we went through, I doubt there's anything else ahead of us that would be able to stop us in this journey we're on.

Naturally, I'm extremely excited with the fact that I have a little kicking 25.3mm baby created by FattyHubby and I, living inside me right now and I can't wait to feel it's first movements or to find out if we'll be having a baby girl or boy. Of course, as this is our first child, it doesn't really matter and besides, I've already found names for both girl and boy.

I only found out I was preggers at 5 weeks and I didn't have much time to actually enjoy the news as from week 6 onwards, I started having certain complications and had to be on complete rest in bed till now. Yes, I'm at week 13 now and still in bed rest.

No worries though, everything's okay now and I would be able to go back to work by next week and hopefully, I will finally be able to enjoy being pregnant.

Krabi

2008-02-22T14:59:00.008+08:00

Yes, guilty! Almost a month with nothing from me *blush*

But a lot of things took place the pass few weeks and it's a long story...will blog about it in my next blog.

As for now....enjoy the over-due pictures from Krabi.

Don't be expecting much cos I was having the mother of all morning sickness when we were there and was curled up in bed most of the time throughout the trip. Damn waste of money...

Suddenly, we heard people shouting "Crocodile!!! Crocodile!!!"

And I'm thinking....hmmm....in salt water???

Everyone rushed to the edge of the water to see it.

This is your crocodile lah. Biawak more like it!

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God sends sunshine all the time

2008-01-18T18:18:00.000+08:00

So, remember about a month back I blogged about getting a pregnancy test kit? *click*

Well, I did....

*BIG grin*

Flying on Friday!

2008-01-07T16:56:00.000+08:00

You know, I've never been to Krabi, so I don't really know what to expect from there. Apparently, it's not a nice shopping haven as Bangkok is, and there really isn't much night life to check out as Koh Samui had.

But it's the BEACH!!!!

That already means something, no?

Soft white sand, clear blue waters and hopefully, bright shining sun in the sky as well. Mmmm...sounds heavenly to me already and that itself is enough to make me shiver.

But what I'm really looking forward to is authentic Thai food!

I've been craving for so much spicy sour food lately it's scaring me. I swear I'm half Thai.

I mean, the last time we drove out of Thailand, they thought my friends were smuggling a Thai girl out and no matter how much I showed them my passport and insisted I was NOT Thai, they insisted as much as that I was.

Stupid Thais (not all lah).

Can already imagine me skipping around in my bikini yah!

2008

2008-01-03T15:56:00.000+08:00

Gone were the days where New Year's countdown were spent screaming our lungs out under a sky of fireworks, squashed in between a sea of people right in the middle of town. No more 3 hour long preparations to look good and ready to party before jumping into a car and heading down to town waaaay before the traffic starts picking up. And long gone are the days of RM50 cover charge + one free drink and free access to any clubs around that area.

2 years ago, FattyHubby and I spent the New Year's in Singapore, counting down in Orchard Road surrounded by unfamiliar faces of Singaporeans.

Last year, we went to Penang with Gord & Cin, and slept right through countdown =)

This year, we had a quiet countdown at ButtercupTjin's house in Klang. Totally different from the pass few New Year's that I've ever been through. And I actually enjoyed it. Just sitting there, having girly chats with BlossomMich and ButtercupTjin, talking about old college times, giggling about everything under the sun, and just...well...enjoying each another's company.

It was good. It was one of the best New Year's countdown I've ever had.

Damn. I think I finally have to admit to the fact that I've aged. And that I'm STILL aging.

I still feel like a young girl though, and I know, sometimes, just sometimes, I'm in self-denial about growing up.

Yes, I'm 28 (well, not till June anyways), ladies & gentlemen, and I'm not embarass to admit that. After all, age is only a number and being young is all about the mind and the heart.

However, no matter how much I try to deny the fact that I am indeed getting older, I can't help not noticing that everyone around me are growing too.

Nieces and nephews are running around and screaming their lungs out now while not too long ago, they were just sleeping peaceful infants in the baby cot.

Grandpa and grandma are begining to look awfully older now and they can hardly walk for long anymore before needing to take a rest.

Even mummy, no matter how much she tries to hide her white crown by going for hair dyes every month, there is no denying the extra lines on her face.

I guess, in a way, everyone else is trying to deny the fact that they too are getting older. But that's just how life goes, and there's no way we can ever turn back time.

And there's no way that I can ever be 18 again. I'm 28.

So, where do I go from here?

I guess I already know the answer.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

2007-12-30T15:58:00.000+08:00

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>_<'
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I know it's like almost New Year's now and I'm almost a week late in wishing everyone a Merry Christmas but, it's better late than never and besides...
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Christmas is 12 days long =)
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Like every Christmasses in the pass 5 years, this one was no different. It zoomed pass too fast for me to actually savour every minute of the day. But all the same, I'm glad everyone in the family are still here to enjoy and spend yet another Christmas together.
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Next year, we plan to do something different for Christmas, tkaing the opportunity that Grandpa and Grandma are still healthy and able to walk around.
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But then, I shall let you know what we have planned next year because if I tell you now, then I'd have to kill you. More like I'd have nothing to blog about next year Christmas.
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The only thing different about Christmas this year is this.
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Usually, my Christmas pressies would consist of stuff like accessories, slutty looking clothes which I like, books, bags, etc.....stuff that are like my personal favourites lah.
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But this year, I got.....plates, tableware, drinking glasses, chopstick and holders, towels, RECIPE books!!!!, and bla bla bla....all the absolutely boring stuff you can think of!
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And just as I was about to open my mouth to complain....
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"That's for getting married. Welcome to the club!!!"
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-_-'
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So anyways, before I go off and forget to blog in another week's time, here's to you! Have a great 2008 and may it be much better than the year before!

Happy Holidays everyone!!!
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Hmmm....

2007-12-17T15:25:00.000+08:00

My horoscope today says:

Delicate game of dominoes set up in MY life right now? And if one falls, it is likely to tumble, causing a huge chain reaction of chaos.

Hmmm......*drums fingers and frowns*

I haven't been feeling very well the pass few days. 5 days, to be exact.

I've been feeling nauseaus and throwing up almost every morning.

I have a paid-for Krabi trip in Jan 08, a 4D/3N vacation of nothing but sand, sea, sun and shopping!

I have a trip to Greece in May 08, one and a half weeks of pure fun trotting around a country I've never been to in my life.

My life like dominoes. If one falls, will cause chain reaction and chaos.

Hmmmm.....*frowns a little more*...

I'm getting the pregnancy kit tonight!

Of urinary infections & pictures from the weekend that was

2007-12-12T15:48:00.000+08:00

I'm cursed lah.

It's like as if I'm destined to suffer through it like once every 2 years.

So annoying.

So, if you see me dousing myself with water like crazy, don't ask why.

I'm in pain.

And it isn't nice.

-_-'

Was stuck in the jam for 2 fucking hours yesterday, just trying to get from BU to KL.

In the end, we ended up in Pavilion for lunch at 4pm.

FUCKING LUNCH

at 4pm!

Okay, picture time!

From over the weekend and a bit more.

Christmas decor at 1-Utama New Wing

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Sarah's 18th Birthday
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pretty cupcakes

RM3 for one...mummy bought 50pcs

birthday girl

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sarah's jon

with her Godma

daddy's Charlie Angels

the family

with FattyHubby

new nephew Devon

our own christmas tree

And some random shots I took in the office using my hp. I was bored.
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The weekend that was

2007-12-10T17:49:00.000+08:00

Saturday and Sunday flew by just like that *snaps finger* and now, annoyingly, it's Monday again. Thank goodness tomorrow is a Selangor holiday, so my mood's not the usual black.

Had to return the wedding gown to Pretty In White on Saturday. I kept it for 2 weeks after the wedding and I still didn't want to give it back, but I knew I had to. And besides, I wanted my RM800 deposit back too...so BROKE!!! and with Christmas coming...die!

Almost cried when I handed the gown back to them. It just brought back so much memories - me going there so many many many months back to choose the gown, me realising that this gown was THE gown, me going for the fitting so many times, me going back again with mummy to show her, me walking down the aisle in it, me almost tripping myself like a gazillion times throughout the day - handing over that gown was like handing over all those memories. Thank goodness for photographs and videos. And I get to keep the shoes *BIG grin*

We also celebrated Sarah's birthday on Saturday, and so, I didn't have much time to think twice about buying the gown from PIW because I had to rush off home to OUG to help mummy prepare for the party. Thank goodness for that because I was thiiiiiiis close to just telling PIW "Keep the deposit lah, and here's another RM200. I'm keeping the dress". Emo impulse.

FattyHubby and I checked out Signature@The Gardens for the first time and I must say, I was impressed. Very impressed. It didn't even look like the conventional GSC you find everywhere now. It didn't even look like a cinema. FattyHubby and I were standing right in front of it and yet, we asked the security guard where it was.

"Kat sini lah," he answered, looking at us weirdly.

Damn malu. Like so swaku like that.

Imagine, you still get the usual popcorn counter, but get this, you have a dessert bar as well, and a cafe that serves yummy coffee for less than RM10! Cool stuff right.

Of course the price per movie ticket is not cheap lah, RM20 for one. But with all these add-on frills you get, RM20 is actually not bad lah.

Note to myself: Don't even think of going to Gardens for Christmas shopping. Don't even know how to pronounce the names of the boutiques, wanna shop there. What nonsense.

Sunday was another celebration. Devon's christening. So everyone was at church to witness this while he slept right through the whole thing, except for the part where Father Simon baptised him and poured COLD FREEZING WATER over his little head lah. He woke with a jolt! Poor baby.

And when CuzNette left to go back to Singapore today, she sent me an sms.

"Kristy.....Going home now. Have left the baby's baptism baju at my mum's place in case you need it before my no 2 comes along *winks*"

Well.....let's put it this way. My honeymoon's in May. I'm most likely to ensure that NOTHING happens between now and then, but then again, should accidents happen, then, well....*shrugs*....thanks for the baptism baju, girl!

-_-

Christmas is coming. And everywhere looks soooooo good with the Christmas decor up. I'm feeling so excited about it already!

So many pictures to upload, but I haven't had time to download it from my camera yet. Busy people like that wan.

Ok, 34 presents to buy, I MUST start planning my shopping soon. Christmas is in 2 weeks!!! And I'm BROKE!

You think I'm a baby making machine?

2007-11-30T17:31:00.000+08:00

Now that the wedding is over, I realise that conversations around me, which were always centered around weddings for the pass few months, have now taken a sharp turn and has landed on the topic of babies.

Yes. BABIES.

And we're talking about only less than a week from the wedding ya.

Like on Monday night, FattyHubby (previously known only as Fatty) and I brought my new in-laws out for dinner and throughout the entire drive home, my mum-in-law was going on and on and on about "When you're pregnant, you must do.....", "When you're pregnant, you cannot cut anything on....", "You know, when I was pregnant, I was....." and it just went on and on till we got back to the house.

Aaargh!!! The pressure!!!

We haven't even gone on our honeymoon lah, relax a bit can?

And then, on Tuesday night, we brought my parents and sisters out for dinner, and the entire conversation during dinner was how mummy gave birth to me...the same old story about her eating too many watermelons and her waterbag broke 8 weeks early and I came out into the world a prematured baby....so poorthing.

*Rolls eyes*

Do you feel the pressure now too???

And then. AND THEN. I called mummy on Thursday night, just to talk to her, update her about my day at work and told her that my dad-in-law was sick but was too stubborn to go see a GP, and you know what she told me???

She said, "Tell your father-in-law that he must put importance on his health if he wants to still be alive to see his grandchildren. Must use the grandchildren word as a carrot to dangle in front of him, then he'll be more careful with his health".

Use MY children as a DANGLING CARROT????

This is so super salah.

And then, in the background, I heard daddy come back with some super comeback line to mummy.

"Dangle what lah. Nanti biji also don't have, what to dangle"

>_<'

I soooo need to go home and lie down now. My head has been pounding non-stop since this morning and I know it's telling me to go back and sleep!

But I can't.

My boss conveniently RSVP-ed herself and I to go for The Sun & The Edge Annual Party tonight @ Modestos, Desa Sri Hartamas, but you know what the funny thing is, my boss is also conveniently on mc today and I'm left to go all by my lonesome self.

Check out what my horoscope for the day says about me today:

See!!! Even it can tell that I'm not in my usual happy-clappy, super Ms. PR woman mood!.

I SO WANNA GO HOME!!!!

AND SLEEP!!!!!!!

Thank goodness I managed to coax DesignerKajen and SuperSalesManFoong to come be my escorts for the night, else I'd die from boredom.

"Eh, come follow me for The Sun & Edge --"

"Dowan lah"

"No, but its --"

"Dowan lah"

"Got free flow booze worr"

"Aiyah, why never say earlier! OF COURSE we attend with you"

-_-'

Idiots

So how do I feel?

2007-11-28T17:18:00.000+08:00

I think there's much more to marriage other than the fact that I have officially sealed my life away to ONE man for the remainder of my days.

It's the fact that I can no longer decide to walk out whenever I want to anymore, especially after an argument, unless it's just to head downstairs and sulk in the living room. But that would just be stupid.

Fatty and I have been living together way before we tied the knot, so living together now as husband and wife doesn't really make much of a difference to me. But, after the wedding, it feels like as if an invisible thread has tied us together and has somehow bonded us even more because suddenly, we seem to be taking each another more seriously.

Marriage is not gonna be easy, that's for sure, and it will take a lot of hard work from both parties to make it work out, especially when it comes to sensitive issues like finances, and men CAN be idiots, so living with one for the rest of one's life will definitely be challenging, but it's sure beats the hell out of living alone, doesn't it.

And as I've pledged my vows before God in church, I shall repeat them again here in my blog, the vow to love one man and only one man for the rest of my life. What God brings together, men can never divide.

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Thank you to all those who came to share the moment with me and for all your beautiful gifts.

:)

2007-11-16T18:07:00.000+08:00

Big day's next Sat and I'm so super busy that I don't have the time to blog.

But just dropping by to say hi and no, I'm not dead.

It's my wedding!!!

Mrs. Fatty.....

Lost

2007-11-13T18:31:00.001+08:00

I'm lost.
I don't know what to do.
I just don't.

Calling OFF the Wedding!!!

2007-11-06T17:33:00.000+08:00

Yes, I am.

So many things happened over the weekend and I just don't think I'm ready to get married to one guy. It's just not possible.

And I'm afraid this man might not be the right one for me.

Afterall, we've known each another for less than 5 years, and I don't even know what his favourite colour is!

For the weirdest reasons, I keep thinking purple. And I have no idea why.

But purple cannot be his favourite colour, can it?

And the stress of getting a wedding party together. There's just no getting anywhere! We're both so totally incompatible and cannot agree on the slightest things.

This already is one good reason why the wedding shouldn't go on.

At all.

Besides, here are more reasons why I'm calling off the wedding...

Red Thongs

I absolutely WILL NOT wear red thongs to seduce my husband to be! How sexy can a girl in red thongs be anyways? Have you ever seen a mandrill? Yes, that's exactly what I would look like if I were to put this on and seduce my husband on the wedding night. He might just puke everything out.

Cute Men

I seem to be bumping into them everywhere I go. And these men are charming, handsome, and oh so good looking that if I were to tie myself down to one man forever and ever amen, I would no longer be able to flirt and play with cute men.

The 'Thing'

Being a virgin as myself, I have never seen the 'thing' before. And to see it like this??? It scared the hell outta me!!! No way am I ever gonna be able to look at something like that without laughing my head off. My poor husband will be so traumatised cause each time he takes it out, I

might start laughing.

Condoms

They taste really bad. So bad. And one advice, never EVER have condoms with whisky. Nasty!

and finally...

CRAZY DRESS SENSE

Once people get married, even the fashionable divas themselves will loose all fashion sense and start dressing like the average married women out there. Trust me, I've seen to many diva friends turn into boring married women overnight and I do not wanna be one of them!

So, thus conclude why I'm calling the wedding off.

*sigh*

think so easy meh!

too much in love with fatty lah

Btw, girls (you know who you are), thanks a BUNCH for the wonderful hen's party. I had a great time though I can't remember much from it. Love you all!

Yesterday

2007-11-02T16:56:00.000+08:00

We brought mummy to Fridays to celebrate her birthday yesterday and she was soooo happy. I think cos we always bring her to fancy restaurants and she hates seeing us spend so much on her so when we told her this year's gonna be at Fridays, she was glad that it was somewhere not too pricy. Yah right. Bill came up to RM550 anyways.

She turned beeroot red when the Friday waiters made her stand on her chair and sing us a song. It was so funny cos she was already red from the beer and I didn't expect her to get any redder than that. But she did!

I went all the way to Curve to get her the Jelly cake, and it was sooooo beautiful, we didn't want to eat it. But in the end, half disappeared.

Anyways, here are some random pictures I took here and there during the pass few weeks. I forgot about them actually...hahaha!

At Mambo Jumbo during Raya weekend. It was sooooo crowded we almost died.

When we got there at 10.30pm, there was practically nobody around. I had the whole dance floor to myself and didn't have to fight anyone.

An hour later, I was doing the boogie on the spot. With tall people towering on either side of me, their arms raised towards the heaven, I was smelling hell lah.

We left close to 1am. Old dy lah. Cannot take it anymore. Must go home and sleep. But we ended up hanging out at some German pub in Taman Tun, having German beers and watching some softball game thingy on the big screen.

Told you lorr. Old mah.

Painting the bridal room. Well, I directed. They painted.

.

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Shadows of my dreamcatcher against the car door. I was bored and stuck in a jam.

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Mosaic tiles at TheCottonClub. Don't EVER go there for their buka puasa buffet okay. Just dont.

The funniest!

Fatty went around catching the kittens and spraying the purple disinfectant on their ears cos they were all having ear disease.

By the time he was done with them, we had kittens with purple ears, running all around the backyard!!!

What's happening?

2007-10-31T18:29:00.000+08:00

Well, so, been a little confused lately

About trust. faith. loyalty.

Insecurities are running through me
And even when I look at him

I don't feel anymore secure than I should be

What's happening, I ask myself

Only to be faced with emptiness
No answers to soothe me

Is this what it's going to be like
From now till forever?

As we sat through lunch in silence
He looking everywhere else but at me
Me playing with the food on my plate
I feel a stab

And again, I ask myself, what's happening

Is it just the insecurities?

Or is it more?

And still, no answers.

Is this a mistake then?
Something that is going to ruin my life forever

Or is this normal?

But I know normal
And normal does not feel like this

So, please tell me

What's happening?